Pretending To Be Real

Pretending To Be Real

A Poem by Hello, Elle
"

To you, for fooling me as long as you did.

"
You sit there next to me,
Your lies seeming so real.
It's unbelievable how I can not see
Exactly how you feel.

We laughed and we joked
We stayed up all night long.
And every time you spoke
I never believed you were wrong.

My life was your tenure
Documented like archives.
And you never stopped yourself,
Your words just kept stabbing me like knives.

© 2010 Hello, Elle


Author's Note

Hello, Elle
I wrote this one in my journal as well, and decided to put it up.
Please give me your opinions, and con-crit is always welcome!

My Review

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Featured Review

These are the types of poems I love to read. Whether or not YOU are the one who experienced this, it is still deep. I can tell that it came from within. It's REAL. I love that. I don't care for grammar or any other type of rule that comes with writing. When it comes to poetry, you just write what you feel, and how you feel like writing it. Those are ALWAYS the best poems. However, I guess criticism is helpful. Bottom line: Don't stop writing.

Be blessed.


Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

good one see mine too "QUEST OF LIFE".

Posted 9 Years Ago


I'm always drawn to titles that I believe could represent me and/or be something I can relate my own memories to and this definitely was one of those titles (as well as the most important part: the poem).

Like Neisha Ann said in her featured review, it's really the poems that come straight from emotion there in that very moment you're feeling that emotion that are the most admirable. I loved being able to draw that from this piece.

Keep it up with the great writing!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

These are the types of poems I love to read. Whether or not YOU are the one who experienced this, it is still deep. I can tell that it came from within. It's REAL. I love that. I don't care for grammar or any other type of rule that comes with writing. When it comes to poetry, you just write what you feel, and how you feel like writing it. Those are ALWAYS the best poems. However, I guess criticism is helpful. Bottom line: Don't stop writing.

Be blessed.


Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

great job

Posted 10 Years Ago


great feelings flow :) I realy enjoyed reading it..

Posted 10 Years Ago


I disagree personally yes it does seem like it's directed toward someone. But i liked the last line. A little much but it still went real well with it

Posted 10 Years Ago


I really enjoyed reading this, despite the sadness I felt from it. Thanks for sharing something that seems to personal!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I found myself wondering if this was a personal message to someone that wronged you somehow. You seem upset at yourself for not seeing through the deception and so you are inclinded to be incredulous with this person. I enjoyed the poem. The last paragraph stumbled a little and perhaps needs to be amended a bit. Otherwise, I appreciate the glimpse into your soul. Keep up the good work.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Slightly narrative, almost mysterious, and well written.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This poem really pulled me in, it tells a story of being lied to and stabbed in the back by someone you love, i really enjoyed this, nice write.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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418 Views
10 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 23, 2010
Last Updated on August 23, 2010
Tags: pretend, real

Author

Hello, Elle
Hello, Elle

Neverland, CT



About
My name is Elle, or Eli. Whichever you prefer. I am a sixteen year old girl who dreams to become a journalist one day. I play guitar, and I recently bought myself a beautiful Yamaha APX 500! I writ.. more..

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