As silently as death itself.

The first frost of winter

Daylight came with silence
the world now dusted white,
Jack had worked his magic
under cover of the night.

Stencilling onto windows
feathered, crystalled fronds
whilst below on cills, motionless
lay tiny frozen ponds.

And hedgerows, sparkled, glistened,
lit by a watered light,
the spiders toils woven there
iced doilies, what a sight.

A bird then pierced the silence
and a shiver through me sent
as it mourned the passing seasons
with a haunting, shrill lament.












,

Author's Note

Not sure whether this works !

Reviews

[Beccy]

It works! Absolutely lovely, and throughout the whole poem, the imagery conjured up was crystal clear in the mind's eye.

Absolutely my kind of poetry; and I though I don't ordinarily pick a favourite line, I thought your description of those little ponds of frozen water lying on the window cills was perfect and so very unique.

Beccy.

[Gee]

I'm chuffed you found this to your liking Beccy.
Thank you

[Kent Rawski]

Wow beautiful writing delicately portrayed, there is none greater than nature to bring our senses alive, wonderfully woven. Robert frost may have well wished he'd thought of this poetry in motion

[Gee]

Thank you for your kind words Kent, very much appreciated

[Lorry]

Your words echo ominously in me bones Gee, as Jack and Jane frost make it a family affair and bring their kids to work, just to make sure we all got the memo that Summer has gone, apparently... Was it even here?
Stencilled windows, iced doilies and a shrill lament paint a vivid picture of the look on your face as you left for work this morning. If that painting was hanging in a galldry, it would simply be titled "bugger." 😀

[Gee]

Or "Bollox, I hate the cold"
Cheers Lorry, I'm effing freezing :))

[Lorry]

Me three. Im clinking as i walk.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

It works. It most definitely works! This is scintillatingly beautiful! Each description is so vivid to the mind's eye; and having recently experienced our first frost here, I see it all too clearly. Just lovely.

[Gee]

Hi Linda, quite taken aback that this has been so well received.
Thank you kindly

[Laura Kate]

Such a peaceful and beautifully painted picture. I used to love taking photos of the frosty spider webs which are usually so well hidden, it was lovely to go back there.
Laura.

[Gee]

Thank you. I'm glad this wee poem stirred happy memories

[Ken Simm.]

Lovely, calm, gossamer, winters feel to this. I love mornings such as this and we get a lot up here. you have described it beautifully.

[Gee]

Thank you Ken

[Eilis]

I think it works beautifully, if you’re asking. A vivid, almost emotional, portrait of the coming of winter. Jack Frost an all.

I love the way I can feel the quiet. Your description of the scene does lend a particularly winter feeling. We have not made it here yet, thankfully. Though we’re close, just above freezing temps.

Such glorious imagery in this. I always wonder what it is the birds love so much about cold mornings, but I do notice how they gather then as though the world had just been reborn.

Really enjoyed this poem.

[Gee]

Good morning Eilis, thank you kindly

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you do meter and rhyme so well....it is subtle and doesn't make us focus too much on the form...we just know it is there...and the imagery works so well to give us that first sign of death of summer, fall and everything colorful stripped from its roots.
j.

[Gee]

Thank you kindly Jacob :))

[emmajoy]

'.. And hedgerows, sparkled, glistened, ~ lit by a watered light, ~ The spiders toils woven there ~ iced doilies, what a sight. '

Of course it works, it's beautiful! Your meter is near perfect, runs freely and naturally; the phrasing moves like a paintbrush, description and emotions shared with your reviewers. Reading again. it's been like watching someone paint a picture then.. finally finished, stands back and i stand alongside.

[Gee]

Hi EmmaJ, thank you. Have reverted back to simple rhyme for a wee while.
Hope you are not getting to wet :)