Grocery List

Grocery List

A Poem by House of Immite
"

The checklist for being considered as one of the guys

"

Has the tongue to be sarcastic.

Has the sanity to act erratic.

Has the mind to think sickly.

Has the wit to reply quickly.

Has the body to strip fully.

Has the issues to play a bully.

Has the spirit to follow a team.

Has the jealousy to destroy a dream.

Has the heart to love and hate.

Has the sense to differentiate.

Has the temper to start a fight.

Has the energy to stay up all night.

Has the humor to crack a joke.

Has the need to grab and stroke.

Has the nerve to give orders.

Has the courage to cross borders.

Has the taste to pick and choose.

Has the sport to never lose.

Has the lungs to smoke weed.

Has the belly to overfeed.

Has the butt to warm what’s cold.

Has the mouth to spread the untold.

Has the style to look the same.

Has the money to achieve fame.

Has the knowledge to compensate.

Has the gift to play fate.

Has the checklist to tick a friend.

Has the qualities from start to end.

© 2012 House of Immite


Author's Note

House of Immite
The first poem I try to utilize the technique of listing fruitfully.

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Reviews

Catalogue poems are always fun and stimulating exercises in description, studying an object from all angles. In this one, the way you form the lines into rhyming couplets, with four stressed syllables in each line, creates some interesting turns of phrase, e.g. "Has the style to look the same," which aren't immediately clear until the reader makes the connection back to the theme - "being one of the guys."

With that in mind, though, this poem needs something to make that theme clear from the outset, just in case you post or publish it in a venue that doesn't allow you to include that explanatory author's note under the title. Traditionally, catalogue poems begin with a line that encapsulates their topic, but you might find that hard to work into your parallel line structure. So, at the very least, I would recommend giving it a title that explains the theme.

The last two lines give the poem a subtle self-referential twist, giving the suggestion that you (or the narrator, if this isn't your personal perspective) are talking about a specific mate of yours. It's a nice touch, and more importantly it has a conclusive quality that makes the ending clear and non-abrupt.

Posted 7 Years Ago


an amazing way how just a list can be made into a poem, a rhyming one at that. it's funny and full of irony there is wisdom in these words.

Posted 8 Years Ago


ahhh... the list poem (: you don't see too many of these now a days.. its the mark of a knowledgeable writer, that is, when its done correctly, and i would say.. this is well done. Still love the end rhyme and the slant rhyme you use in it, my only thought was the stanza "has the lungs to smoke weed" its an obfuscation to non smokers, to non smokers, its a turn off, they would walk away then and there, to smokers, its a turn on. so its a double edged sword, see about using abstraction in that line.. i dont think it would hurt the poem if you somehow masked the truth, or the edge of the word so to speak.. something like, try to think of a strain, that you could use there that would mask how blunt (no pun intended) the word weed is to non smokers.. it would add a lot to the poem i think.. either way.. great work... -s

Posted 8 Years Ago


this is so creative

Posted 8 Years Ago


this is a fun poem. I really like the format

Posted 8 Years Ago



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Added on March 5, 2012
Last Updated on March 5, 2012

Author

House of Immite
House of Immite

Amman, Jordan



About
The past formulates who we are today. This is the loose basis of my poetry. I'm 19 years old and I study architecture. I speak Arabic and English fluently, now learning German and hopefully after t.. more..

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