The World is Writing

I'm not a fan of this poem but I thought I'd publish it for criticism. Be harsh. I know it is nothing compared with some of the pieces I have composed.

An escape from this peripheral existence,

Monotony seeming a part of social insistence.

Words and syllables become a whole new world

As refreshing as the sight of a beautiful watefall...

 

Cast in the light of society's consideration,

Something of an expectation is the rejection.

Misunderstood by those who do not dare see.

As innocent and alluring as Nature herself.

 

Reciprocation of twisted subliminal meanings,

Curses disguised as beautiful blessings.

Absorbed in an existence that comes to an end...

It seems that it is everything that humanity is destined to be...

Author's Note

Please be harsh. I know it is terrible but I can improve on it. Should I trash it? Constructive criticism is helpful. Don't just tell me that it is bad - tell me why. Thank you.

Reviews

[Tate Morgan]

I find your intelligence is high the idea is sound . I think it may be preferable to others if you used words that had fewer syllables.While I don't object in any way I see many who prefer to read simpler meanderings in more complex ways.It isn't the word that makes something sophisticated .It is the way it is used .I hope that came out right.I personally like a flowing melody myself.

[Lorraine Pearson]

No, don't trash it! I must say, I had to read it three times. For me, I felt like I was reading a riddle...then I glanced up at the title, and started again from the top. I believe this piece is truly written for someone who is a writer... someone who can appreciate the value of the escape of words, and the catharsis of expression. With that in mind, I feel this arena a wonderful place to post such a write...

The final line of the write continues to trip me up-- but I am just one person. Overall, I enjoyed the challenge of the puzzle in this. :)
~Lorraiyne