Criminal Within Me.

Criminal Within Me.

A Poem by SuicidePact.

I wipe the tears from my eyes,

Wash the blood from my hands.

What have I done?

Why have I done it?

I’ll plead temporarily insane.

If I run now, maybe I won’t get caught.

If I run now maybe I’ll have a chance at life.

When they find me, it’s the end of me.

What will I tell them? My family and friends...

Will they believe me? When i say I don’t know why?

Will they comfort me? When I start to cry?

© 2012 SuicidePact.

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A nice opening hook. Well structured and smoothly done, but you might want to consider expanding it, sometime in the future. It could be that there is an awful lot more there. I liked it as is though. If farms out so many questions to the reader that they can't help but become a small part of things

Posted 11 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


I like the questions in this poem. The attitude after a act of a troubled action.
Love this line: "I’ll plead temporarily insane."
I also really like the ending line with the last two questions.

Posted 10 Years Ago

you ended it perfectly

Posted 10 Years Ago

I love reading this. The first lines just pop and the blood draws the eye. I like the lines when you go back and forth with yourself. good job.

Posted 10 Years Ago

This reminds me of Man Down by Rihanna. I love the suspense and drama in this and I love how you make the word "blood" look so irresistibly bloody :)

Posted 10 Years Ago

spooky and mysterious, really makes you want to get an answer to the question 'why?'
Nice one, enjoyable and leaves you with something to think about.

Posted 11 Years Ago

Good job, very hooking, would love to see more of this

Posted 11 Years Ago

Wow. I love this! Nice job

Posted 11 Years Ago

I love your imagination and hidden monologue in your poems! I like the structure of this piece, the word Blood in red...all this thoughts are very beautifully described...Thank you for sharing!

Posted 11 Years Ago

Man I feel like this right now, I really like your expression because I can relate to a
lot of your work very well expressed.
Expressive Write.

Posted 11 Years Ago

I really like it, to me, to could be a song, I really enjoyed this (:

Posted 11 Years Ago

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68 Reviews
Added on April 5, 2012
Last Updated on April 5, 2012



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