Welcome

Written to "Nightmare" by Avenged Sevenfold

As black rises

In your soul

"Be very afraid"

You hear them whisper

To you in the night

 

"We want you

With your black heart

Killers eyes

We want you for

Hell and demonology"

 

Where you belong

In a fire pit

Of flames so cold

Memory of murder

Burns like a brand

On your mind

 

Welcome to the afterlife

You fit right in

With your new neighbors

And your still alive

Imagine how it'll feel

When you're dead

 

Sleep now

Get ready

For a demon

Tonight

It's your time

To feel

What you are

 

As you get greated

To a hell

All your own

Tonight

Reviews

[Blue Moon Ice Cream]

I've never heard the song that inspired you to write this, but I really like the dark images and tone of this. I can imagine these words being spoken by a man with a low, sinister voice. :D My only criticism is that the flow seemed a bit choppy. I also noticed a few small spelling errors:

"And your still alive"--you're
"As you get greated"--greeted

It seems to me like the first two lines of the last stanza would flow better if they read along the lines of "As you are greeted / By a hell." That just makes more sense, in my opinion.

[Kenneth The Poet]

In the eyes of the committed zealot, this is what happens to the soul of the recalcitrant, the ones with hearts stonier than Georgia bedrock.

Nice job.

[Coyote Poetry]

I don't know. When you get the free ride to hell. There will be no warning. I like the way you made the poem come alive.
"We want you
With your black heart
Killers eyes
We want you for
Hell and demonology"
A very strong ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote

[Ravyne Hawke]

Excellent poem befitting the song.. I can see why it would inspire you. I love the imagery in this piece.

[brenda]

so dark and realy deep this is really good !!

[Lily Mae]

An interesting write.. great work..xx