A shoulder to cry on...

A shoulder to cry on...

A Poem by Jamestown
"

A safe zone...

"
A SHOULDER TO CRY ON...

I look in the direction of where my mother is standing
and I can tell by her posture and the fragile look in her eyes
something is obviously wrong,

Not to quick to invade her space, I allow her some time
too visit her thoughts and emotions,

As a few minutes tick away and the big hand on the clock
strikes the 12, and the new hour starts to run it's course
I think it's the appropriate time to tippy-toe over to her
and find out what's eating at her, fully aware when I ask
she will become Niagara falls instantly,

I tread softly and with caution,
I whisper "mom" then again "mother"
She slowly turns in my direction and says "yes son"
I reply "what's wrong"
She shakes her head back and forth and says
"I just don't understand this family of ours sometimes"
I tried so hard raising you kids to love, respect and to support
me and one another and our family does none of this, we are
constantly at each other's throats! Tears flowing like the Colorado river,

I reply "I know mom you tried your best" everything will be alright
I embrace her into my body and lend my shoulder for her to cry on,

But the truth be told, with 4 grown adult kids, with 3 different dads
a multitude of mistakes between us,major resentment and jealousy
I honestly don't know for sure if everything will ever be alright,

I know for a fact that my mother knows this, but I feel I am obligated
to answer the way a did and continue to pray that the good Lord will
fix this hell bound family and until then I will always have a shoulder
for my mommy to cry on...




© 2015 Jamestown


Author's Note

Jamestown
All glory and honor belongs to Christ Jesus!
Ephesians 6:1-3 honor your father and mother...

My Review

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Reviews

Thanks for sharing. The first three lines pulled me in. Your mother has a lot to deal with.
Mistakes:
line five, to is too.
Third line from the end, "the way a did".
Have fun

Posted 8 Years Ago


Jamestown

8 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and your helpful hints, b-blessed!
Thank you for the reminder of this verse. It is one I struggle with...a lot...with my mother. Reading your words, reminded me that no matter what, she is my mother and she has done the best she knew how. Your writing is beautiful.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

I truly thank u for taking the time to check my work out, b-blessed.
lovely story James, always keep her safe and well :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and b-blessed!
This is a touching story, capturing a heartbreaking yet beautiful moment! Your attention and your intuition in relation to your mother is touching and beautiful, knowing someone in and out! Yet sad of course, that her sadness is so familiar.

In terms of form, I think it is a bit heavy in number of words - especially in the end it reads more like a short story. However, I like a lot of your word choices that make the situation real to the reader.
Thank you for sharing this vulnerable poem, it seems you carry the worries of others - remember to rest now and again, don't break your back!

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and your helpful hints!, b-blessed!
You are a good son. At least she has a shoulder to cry on. Your deep faith in God will show the way to you and those around you.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and your kind review!
My friend I feel you on this matter seems growing up we are close but once we achieve adulthood our directions go in different ways and hence we become distant from one another.The scriptures foretell of this rebellion among st family all we can do is trust God and pray for them nice write my friend God bless

Bill

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and b-blessed.
W R Stowe

9 Years Ago

your welcome bro
I really like the overall theme of this poem, but it is bogged down by lack of any real flow and spelling mistakes. One mistake is the first "to" ould be too. Tiny mistakes like that are easy to miss, but can really take the reader out of an experience. The flow itself is much harder to fix. It is important that like this roll of the tongue but this one is just cluncky. Now, I did enjoy the poem. It delivered a nice message and portrayed good emotion. With some cleaning up this could be great, but as it stands right now, it is just okay.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and b-blessed!
Wow. SO deep, filled with a lot of raw emotion. This is a touching piece.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks again and b-blessed!
James today most children are being born into broken families. I was introduced to a young man yesterday that is my nephews half brother on his dads side. There are also 3 sisters by different mothers that my family are now meeting in their 30s.My younger sister married the father, they divorced after one son, she never married again. Lots of people have sad lives. Jesus is the answer. My parents were married 62 years, some very sweet and peaceful, other times almost to the point of divorce. God was their answer. Valentine

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

You are a wise lady my friend, God is definitely the answer:)
Thanks for checking it out and .. read more
You stand
And shoulder the weight of your mothers pain
While you still hold your own
I don't think god could ask any more of you

We have all made mistakes
But if you don't
How can you learn
I should know

I have done a terrible thing
But if I had not I'd still be living a life of utter misery
I guess I will pay for it some day
Blessings

Posted 9 Years Ago


Jamestown

9 Years Ago

Thanks for checking it out and b-blessed!

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1550 Views
44 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on March 17, 2015
Last Updated on May 9, 2015

Author

Jamestown
Jamestown

Denver, CO



About
Fun, spontaneous, outgoing, God fearing man. Enjoy reading and have a passion to write. PTL. ... more..

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