Suffocating In A Puddle of Bleakness

Suffocating In A Puddle of Bleakness

A Story by J.R Schlievert



I'm drowning deeper in a sea of intelligence. The waves are sinking me deeper into the black abyss, known as myself conscious. There's air above me but, I cant grasp it. It's teasing me. At this point I know I shall die. But when? As I observe back, I hear the comments that placed me in this dire aspect. No one to aid me, to pull me out of the hole that I chose to be submersed in. To establish myself, to demonstrate my intelligence. I sacrificed my family, friends, and love. I'm all alone. My goal will be my death. I secluded my self from civilization. Placed in a house with no windows to answer life's great questions. With no human reaction. Nothing. But sadly, I did answer those f*****g questions. I'm suffocating in a puddle of bleakness. All this thought-all this time! For what?  To prove myself. No one to even share my calculations with. Perhaps, the concept of being alone did away with me. Too late now, vision getting dizzy. All I have is my dusky mind that wanted me to preform this experiment. “I hate you” I yelled at myself. I said it once, but it seems to last forever. Echoing in my empty mind. I hate you. As I drew my concluding breath, I stare at the beam of light that flowed out of the chunk of ply wood  that I embed up. I hate you. 

© 2009 J.R Schlievert

Author's Note

J.R Schlievert
just for fun :) tell me what you think

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Made me think of a dark twist the story of Tantalus, what with the things just out of the narrator's reach.

Posted 10 Years Ago

That is raw and powerful emotion!! so many feel these thoughts yet never let them out!!
Great job J.R.!

Posted 10 Years Ago

I love it. A lot of power with such strong words when we look at ourselves.

Posted 10 Years Ago

I found this entertaining and interesting

Posted 10 Years Ago

I really enjoyed this one. :)

Posted 10 Years Ago

that was good.....It was a bit confusing for me, but I'm tired as i read it so......yeah. It was wonderful, though!!!!! I like how the last "i hate you" seemed to linger in the air after you're through reading it. It was good, my friend!!!!

Posted 10 Years Ago

I love your writing it always is very interesting in a good way!!

Posted 10 Years Ago

With venom of palpable anger and pain you have poignantly expressed the pain we allow others to inflict upon us. Sadly we only 'see" what's going on after people are hurt. I have felt the feelings you express, and want you to know you not through with this world. Especially for these reasons my friend, Love Life and I promise it will love you back!
Great spoken word ~ Jude :-)

Posted 10 Years Ago

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8 Reviews
Added on December 19, 2009


J.R Schlievert
J.R Schlievert

Queen Creak, AZ

If a fun loving person! Need help with anything just give me a message and I promise that I will get to you! Im a big guy at 65 (AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! THAT RHYMED!) and I love people! And what ever they .. more..


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