Eyes Wide Open

Eyes Wide Open

A Poem by JavaQueen2000
"

My mind is free to capture the pleasure in the tranquility of nature. Nature on the edge of living life to it's the fullest.

"

 

The wide open space is filled with the gentle ocean spray.
The smell of fresh air permeated the air.
The feel of the warm sun caressed my skin.
I sat watching the serf crashing into the cliff's below.
As I heard the clandestine chorus of the seagulls confer with each other
as they fished for their evening meal.
My eyes are wide open.

 

My mind is free to capture the pleasure in the tranquility of nature.
Nature on the edge of living life to it's the fullest.
I feel their energy surging through my body.
Like their crescendo, emotions surface, crashing into my tranquil mind.
Just as the simple pleasures are encircling the peaceful moments of my life.
My eyes are wide open

 

I feel a disconnected presence searching for the calm within the storm.
A storm of emotional upheaval has torn me apart.
I feel the pieces of my disconnected obsessions forces me to scrutinize my existence.
I have watched as the timeless passionate quest for happiness does not exist in monetary gain.
Only the shallow find happiness in wealth.
My eyes are wide open

 

An emotional void leaves me with a superficial existence.
I desire the taste of true freedom.
The freedom to feel of the warm sun embrace my body.
The freedom to experience energy surging through my soul.
I recognize the value of happiness being measured by the people you have met.
The friends you have gained.
The family you have in your fold
and the God that you are at peace with.
My eyes are wide open.

 

I will hold on to the quiet moments.
Embrace the diversity of life with each serge of energy.
The simple pleasure is within.
I will enjoy the simplicity of existence
and welcome all that life has to offer.
For my eyes are wide open and the simple pleasure is You.

© 2008 JavaQueen2000


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This is a wonderful write - in this poem you have truely managed to catpure all of your emotions, thoughts and feelings.
I like your use of repition throughout - it maintains the feel of the poem. Each of your stanza's builds nicely on the next - building to your final stanza. I like that you have choosen to keep this final stanza shorter, with a storter line length - I think it suits your final thoughts. The only change I would sugguest is in the opening stanza, on the second line, you have repeated the word air - could you use another word only - and this is my own opinion - I think it may sound better.
Congrats on this write.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This is a wonderful write - in this poem you have truely managed to catpure all of your emotions, thoughts and feelings.
I like your use of repition throughout - it maintains the feel of the poem. Each of your stanza's builds nicely on the next - building to your final stanza. I like that you have choosen to keep this final stanza shorter, with a storter line length - I think it suits your final thoughts. The only change I would sugguest is in the opening stanza, on the second line, you have repeated the word air - could you use another word only - and this is my own opinion - I think it may sound better.
Congrats on this write.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on June 8, 2008