Stream of Consciousness

Stream of Consciousness

A Story by Jason_Hendrick

The free verse poem that is my conscious thought

Welcome to my brain everyone, so nice of you to join me on this fine afternoon. If you like covering a wide range of topics in short detail then you've come to the right place. My being scatterbrained, coupled with Ritalin, turns out to be quite the combination! Now look at us, here at the doors of my consciousness, discussing what we're going to do. Without further adieu ladies and gentleman, i bring to you, the unadulterated and unabridged randomness that is my conscious thought.
To be or not to be,
doesn't have to be a question.
Does montana qualify as a state? Theres no way it meets the minimum population requirement for statehood. I was unaware that it wasn't just the last name of that child pop star everyone likes until recently, but now that i know, i think she's already done more for society than montana.
But hey, at least they're not wyoming. The only thing they've ever been good at is wrastlin' cows, and being the far and away best at drawing their own state.
and if you're from wyoming, be thankful you're not from puerto rico, which no one really knows what it is to the united states. It's kinda like the united states just purchased that country.
Even still, Puerto Rico, be thankful you didn't end up like good ole' Native America. 
Genocides not funny...even if you're government doesn't recognize it...
Maybe a riddle is in order here...
What's black and white and red all over?
A race war.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
He experienced ego death and realized there was another choice.
Oh christmas tree, oh christmas tree...
ehhhm... Something, something branches.
Anecdotes maybe?
alright a christian, a jew, and a muslim walk into a bar... What happens?
Nothing immediately, they live out the rest of their lives happily... 
...but when the muslim dies he goes to hell...
...because he drank alcohol...
...not because he's a muslim...
...I'm no anti-semite...
A short skit? Why not?!
Myself:  "Alright and for our next guest, we flew him out from the depths of my childhood memory bank all the way to this inter-cranial studio, he manifested to help me suppress the fact that i was an only child, my very good imaginary friend. The one, the only, Winston!"
Myself: "..." "...Winston?.."
Myself: "Where the hell is winston?"
Disembodied voice coming from backstage: "You heartless son of a b***h! what? You turn 12 and all of a sudden you're too good for your old pal Winston? F**k you man, you and your show."
Myself: "...You're not even real"
Winston: "Say's the guy who's not real, anyways, i'm not comin' out there man. I'll literally only go on you're show if you kill yourself and make me the host"
Myself: "You've been locked up in the back of my head for over a decade, shouldn't you have stockholm syndrome by now or something?... Ill tell you what the show is yours"
That play was called, "The Day my Subconscious Was Convinced To Kill Itself by my Imaginary Friend from Second Grade Named Winston Publicly, Via Fictitious Talk Show"...

Some people tell me Im too creative with my titles. 
Girls have b***s.... What? i made it this long? on average a guy thinks about eroticism every 5 minutes... I like this stat, even though its completely false, it was made by me, so i appreciate it even though it lacks any truth value.
*UNOFFICIAL* Slackers Code of Demotivation(and final thought):
In conclusion, do drugs, don't listen to authority figures, if you see flashing red and blue lights run even if you're doing nothing illegal because they're out to get you. Most importantly always remember, that when the going gets tough...Give up and find a better use of your time.

© 2012 Jason_Hendrick

Author's Note

Made in good fun=) Try not to be too harsh, this was off the top of my head.

My Review

Would you like to review this Story?
Login | Register


I like it I can't be harsh because I write things on the top of my head all the time! :)

Posted 9 Years Ago

Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


1 Review
Added on March 27, 2012
Last Updated on March 27, 2012
Tags: thought, stream, of, consciousness, humor



Philadelphia, PA

I am not a writer, I am a word artist. My pen is my brush, my words are my signature stroke. My thoughts and imagination, provide my inspiration. I seek not to demotivate or destroy, only to cr.. more..