10. A Warm Feeling

Shawn consoles Brooke after her major setback and despite being distant friends grow closer as Brooke cries away her broken heart.

         Brooke knew that Rogue was worried about her. She refused to eat for the next two days. By the third day, she forced herself to eat chicken soup that Rogue made. Brooke lay on the couch with the bowl on the coffee table, the spoon sticking out like a silver tongue. It was half-full of tears and cold. Brooke's appetite disappeared and she looked up, staring at the portrait above the hearth. It was beautiful and soothing much like the Lavender Stream. Elves were always beautiful, though, better than humans in almost every way. Brooke often wished to be more than human. She thought that if she were an elf, a giant, or some other powerful race of creature, she would be faster, stealthier, or stronger. And maybe she would have passed her audition. A tear slid down. What else was she supposed to do now that her dreams were gone? She will never know the feel of those palace corridors that she dreamed about. She will never know...Brooke had to put those thoughts to rest. She sighed. This felt like heartbreak.

Then, what was she going to do about her father? She was glad Rogue let her stay here. She hadn’t heard from her father. It was easy to find Brooke. She was always either around the house or at Rogue’s place. If her father wanted to know about her welfare, this was the first place to check. He had not come, had not even bothered to see if she was alive. Here, Rogue was, her best friend by her side and there for her in every way. She was happy to have him.

Even when she thought about returning to her father’s house, she didn’t want to return. She imagined him telling her how he was right and suggesting repeatedly about the positions he had available for her. They'd just end up quarreling to no end. She didn't want to work at the diner or the theater. She wanted to work...at the palace. Brooke shook her head. That was gone now. She had to decide on something else to do, but what else was there? Maybe work at a sword shop? No, she fought with swords, not made them. Fighting was all she knew. She brightened up, arching her brows. She could always go to college, but what would she major in exactly? Hmm.....maybe martial arts....but then, where would she get the money for tuition? Another dead end. Before she began to ponder, she sank back into a sense of despair. She toiled against the cushion. Besides, that house was not her home anymore. Only strangers lived there and she hated all of them. Perhaps it was her bitterness towards Mary and her daughters that the psychologist noted. What if that was it? Was it even possible for a psychologist to find that kind of thing in her fighting? Brooke didn’t want to believe it because if she did, she was afraid she would spiral into desperation in which she would fake make up with them, and ask the academy principal for a re-audition. No, Brooke was not capable of making up with them.

She looked at the window by the front door. Snowflakes fluttered down like feathers and Brooke wondered when Rogue would be back. He was out hunting, he told Brooke. All she knew was that if he returned with a rabbit, she was going to starve some more.

            Rogue opened the door and wriggled inside the arch. He had a dead hog over one shoulder and an ash bow on the other. He sneezed, shaking his head and for a moment, he looked like a lion shaking his mane. He set the hog on the table and Brooke squirmed against the couch. He glanced from Brooke to the hog. “Did you even touch the soup?”

            Brooke nodded. She had not talked a lot either. Every time she looked at her master, she remembered shame and felt it over and over. She failed him. It was evident that his training her had went to waste. Rogue kept telling her that wasn’t so, but it’s how she felt. She watched Rogue pick the bowl up and rock it to hear if Brooke had really touched it. “At least half of it anyways.”

            “I’m sorry,” Brooke mumbled.

            “No you’re not, Brooklyn, and I wish you would stop saying that.” He gave her a reassuring smile that didn’t work. “You said the master guardian praised you; I am proud of that.”

            “But I-”

            A knock at the door interrupted them. Rogue answered it and Shawn stepped through the archway. Brooke’s eyes widened. What was he doing here? Rogue said nothing about him coming over. This was the first time Brooke had seen him without a dirty working shirt, an apron, and his sleeves rolled up. He looked casual with baggy jeans on and a black turtleneck. His hair was shaggy, but combed neatly. Brooke turned away so she did not seem like she was staring. Brooke knew Shawn was half-elfin and half human, which made him appear handsome. She’d never seen him come down here. He was nothing like Rogue. He loved the life of a bustling city while Rogue loved the life of solitude. Shawn liked to eat fast food or food from a restaurant and Rogue liked to hunt his dinners. They were so different. “Hey Granddad,” said Shawn, but then grimaced when he saw the hog. “Lemme guess, a hog tusk special?”

            “You know me,” said Rogue as he grabbed a knife and began cutting the hog open, getting ready to clean it out. “I love me some hoglens and rice.”

            Once the hog was open, an odor crawled its way over to Brooke, and she grimaced, clipping her nose shut. “Gross, Granddad," scoffed Shawn

            “Did you come here just to find out my dinner plans?”

            Shawn laughed and cleared his throat. “I came to see if a ride around Alagracia would cheer Brooklyn up.” He gave Brooke a shy look as he dangled his keys around his index finger. Brooke absently stared at him. Did he really come down here to cheer Brooke up? Then again, Shawn was always a nice person and Rogue was clueless when it came to women. He probably asked Shawn to come down and help. Besides, getting out of the house might do her some good. 

            “Uh, sure.”

            “Kay, well come on.” Brooke rolled off the couch and her face turned as red as the top of a flame, realizing she had not showered, changed clothes, or anything. She hoped she didn’t stink. She wanted to smell, but Shawn stood right there waiting on her. She walked past him, and he didn’t crinkle his nose or grimace, so she was fine. Unless he was acting polite.

            Winds shoved against her. She shivered. “Oh here,” said Shawn as he wrapped a leather jacket around her arms.

Shawn had a black Mercedes. That job at the sword shack paid him well, Brooke figured. As they walked to his car, he placed a hand on her back, a gesture that let her know in the way that he was similar to Rogue; he had her back, and held her up, though she wanted to fall.

Shawn opened the door for her, shutting it as she stepped inside. The car rumbled and Brooke felt a humming sensation. Shawn pressed the gas pedal and turned the key in the ignition. He peered out of his rear view mirror and backed up. He drove onto the country rode by the Lavender Stream and into the entry wall.

Shawn turned on the radio and some soft rock song played. Brooke wasn’t a music person. She saw it as very trivial in her life. That was in one way she was different from Mom. She was skilled at playing the violin, the piano, the flute, and pretty much any classical instrument. Although, Brooke loved it when Mom played one for her when she went to sleep, music just wasn’t Brooke’s highest interest. Maybe it was because Mom was gone and she just stopped liking music. She remembered Dad used to make her learn piano when she was ten. He wanted to keep the memory of Mom alive back then. Brooke didn’t know what happened now. Oh yeah, Mary. Then a classic piano piece started playing and Brooke became somber. This drive started to turn into a disaster already and they hadn’t left the rural side yet.

Brooke looked at Shawn who said not a word. She expected him to ask questions or make small talk, but he said nothing. She knew Shawn through Rogue’s stories about him, how he went on dangerous quests to obtain particular ingredients for particular swords. They were fun to hear, and made Shawn seem like the bravest man in the world entering the ghostly swamps of the Wilderness and searching for precious metals. It was amazing to be close to the source of such wondrous tales. This fragile looking man did all that.However, Brooke didn’t know him on a friendly level.

Brooke decided to focus her attention back on the scenery. They passed buildings cloaked with lights and festive cheers. Brooke wanted to go and see, but she felt too shy to ask him to stop. Besides the cheers were all over the place. She had no idea where to tell him to stop at exactly. She caught glimpse of the academy and wanted to cry, but she refused to let Shawn see her that way. She even saw the palace and that made her want to burst out in tears. She pressed her shoulder against the window and blew a breath on the glass. “I apologize,” said Shawn as he chuckled. “I seem to have made things worse, huh?”

Brooke shook her head and protested, “No!” she looked at him with a smile. “You didn’t, I’m just being sensitive...” Brooke stopped herself and looked away from him. “You didn’t.”

Shawn lifted his brows and said thoughtfully, “I know a good place to go” He swerved the car around and drove back to the rural side of Alagracia. He drove towards the entry wall, but made a left. What was there? The Lavender Stream trailed out of the entry wall to a peninsula she believed, but what…

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see,” he said in an amused tone. Shawn parked the car on the side of the road. He got out and opened the door for her. She gave him a questioning look, but he just smiled, a charming smile. “Do you trust me?” Brooke stared at him and thought about it. Should she trust him?

“I don’t know,” Brooke replied honestly. “I hardly know you.”

Brooke hoped he wouldn’t be offended. Instead Shawn laughed. “Point taken, but trust me now?”

Brooke met his eyes and shrugged. What’s the worst that can happen? She nodded and he took her hand, pulling her through a narrow way past slim-barked trees clothed with blue and purple vines that wrapped around them. Brooke had never seen this kind of nature before. Brilliant, black night birds fluttered amongst the caressing boughs and mingling treetops, a bit of a romantic scene. Shawn and Brooke came upon a cliff and below the cliff was a wide ocean. The moon was big and golden and lighted the whole Eastern sky, shinning down on lands unknown to either of the two. Brooke was amazed, her mouth agape. Shawn laughed at her, and he sat on the edge of the cliff. She sat next to him, plopping on her butt, and laughing to herself. The first genuine smile she gave these past days. 

Once again, Shawn surprised her by not saying a word for a while. She gazed at the beautiful setting, but it seemed as if it made everything raw. It felt as if reality was there in her face, big and bright. She had not gotten what she wanted and she worked so hard for it. Her shoulders trembled, and she tried to hide her eyes, but it didn’t help. She cried, and she didn’t care that Shawn heard her. “It’s ok,” he said.

Brooke understood, but she did not believe it. “No, why am I still crying about this?” she shouted. “Why am I so weak?” She cupped her face in her hands. “I worked so hard!” She screamed and it echoed bitterly returning to her.

Shawn pulled her close to him and laid her head on his lap. She didn’t object, her cries exhausting her. He rubbed her back and patted her. “I worked so hard,” she mumbled. “I worked so hard and I believed so hard and I fought so hard.” Her sniffling filled the silence. “And what did it get me? Nothing.” Brooke balled her hands into a fist and wanted to punch the earth.

“The best is all we can do, Brooklyn,” he said to her. “And sometimes that’s not even enough.” He sighed. “That only means fate has something more in store for us.”

“I just wish…”

“I know.” Shawn’s company soothed her. He really was a nice person and she felt relieved to know she wasn’t alone as she thought. Her father became a mere stranger, and Mom, who knew where she was? Mary and her daughters were faceless people. But she had friends like Rogue…Rogue and Shawn. It was a warming feeling.

 They laid there for what seemed like eternity and Brooke wouldn’t have minded. The night wore on, pleasantly cold, no longer so bitter. She sniffled and dried her eyes, a part of her revived and suddenly she was ready for whatever to come. 

Author's Note

Dear Reader,

Let me know if I am moving too forward with this. Shawn and Brooke's relationship had always been distant. Rogue asked Shawn to help cheer Brooke up because Rogue is clueless when it comes to women crying. Shawn can help because he is nice and knows about women having grown up with a sister that died. Basically Shawn is being nice. I hope it came across okay. Please tell me what you think.

I chose that picture because it looks like the very place Brooke and Shawn went to.

Thank you for reading!

Sincerely JazzSoulKeke,

God bless