I am trying something here. I am going to give the end to a story of sorts and I am leaving it up to your imaginations to allow the rest of the story play in your mind. If you have an overactive imagination like me I think you will like it so here you go.
I await the gallows
the wind in my hair
my eyes fixated stares
upon a hangs man noose
swaying in the breeze
up top the old elm tree
In the morning
there will be mourning
tears in the eyes of strangers
and bystanders
as an innocent man
is sent to meet his maker
I am not without sin
but left wondering
is this how its meant to end
knowing a truth about life
that some are just meant to die
and its just my time
I find a little comfort in
having known love and this
The greatest journey in life
is the distance two strangers
hearts are willing to travel to fall in love
I await the gallows
the wind in my hair
but it is a smile I wear
knowing I am dying for her
the one I loved
the one that loved me
I am trying something here. I am going to give the end to a story of sorts and I am leaving it up to your imaginations to allow the rest of the story play in your mind. If you have an overactive imagination like me I think you will like it so here you go. I hope you
My Review
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"I await the gallows
the wind in my hair
my eyes fixated stares
upon a hang's man noose " ... the beginning is absolutely gripping.
I've always loved letting my own imagination play a part in reading, sometimes reading is boring if we can't do so. I've been thinking about it a lot lately. A big part of reading anything is relating to it and its my opinion, that this is a great way to relate.
"The greatest journey in life
is the distance two stranger's
hearts are willing to travel to fall in love" again you've managed to touch upon something close to my own heart. This profound statement seems simple at first, yet my own experience speaks otherwise, sadly. :+(
yet this wind blew in kentucky, where i found out it was all a dream. a dead lover decieving, pretending to be the real thing, the place true love abound. the kentucky wind blew as i found out, this dream is a nightmare now, blow wind blow, i need help, sweep me away, so he'll let go, he steals all joy within my soul. my days are dark and my nights are long, i sing and sing these sorrowful songs and the notes blow off when you come my way in perfect key true harmony to the winds beat. every place i go and everywhere i meet i realise the wind will blow for me anywhere and everywhere and thankfully never again will i feel its blow from kentucky. for me there the wind in chains. wind cannot be restrained its like wild fire, it cannot be contained... oh, the rage the rage...
wow this poem feels me with lots of wonder. i can think of far to many beginings for this sad ending. you imagery is amazing. it makes me feel like im watching this or even living this. its beautiful in its morbidity.
Reminds me of The Scarlet Letter in a way. Forbidden love is often the most passionate and though the sacrifice is great if you were to meet anyone that has ever tasted this love you'd never hear a whisper of regret.
I imagine a preacher's dtr and an older man a fisherman, friend to everyone, beloved by the towns people... they meet and as hard as he may try he cannot fight his desire... he should know better he was older and wiser, she being wild young and free... a love too strong to keep a secret it was painted on their faces and stained their hands for everyone to see. They couldn't have it and couldn't want it more... passion is temptation and so they give in.. the preacher finds them there in their bed of sin and love and screams justice for the rap of his dtrs innocence... he doesn't fight, doesn't proclaim his innocence.. for her sake so she will be the victim rather than another noose hung from the tree
thanks for getting my creative gears turning :-) A great idea and concept..
Perhaps this could be the beginning to your ending:
I clearly remember
those wonderful stolen moments
intensely filled with bliss
when my arms embraced
the one of my life
the one I love with every fibre til this day
Then came the day
when she - the princess of my country
was to marry the King of the neighbor land
I as a poor peasant son
had no say in it
even though my heart cried out in unbelievable pain
Watching them leave the cathedral
in those overly pompous clothes
as a married couple
the fragile bride on the King's arm
got sight of me
and tears ran down her lovely cheeks
It was too painful to bear as my heart was breaking
so a plan created itself in my head
and with the help of some friends
I achieved to abduct this wonderful creature
out of the crowns claws
and we fleed far-far away from home
In a country unknown to us
we both were just two beings
deeply and helplessly in love
she - no longer a princess
I - no longer a peasant
drowned in endless love for each other
One day she gave birth
to the fruit of our love
a son fulfilled our dreams
til the day in the village I heard
that soldiers were searching around here
for the still missing princess
I thought it safer
to bring her and our son
to the convent high up in the mountains
there she was safe with the boy
and no-one not even the King
could harm them - I was relieved
Unfortunately on my way home
to get some things we had left behind
to bring them to her
I got trapped, in my hurry I
did not notice the hidden soldiers
trial was fast over, so now ...
- - - - -
I hope you enjoyed.
Your write is wonderfully done as always, and you fully achieved your goal with me for getting my fantasy flowing. Your piece provoked many images and thoughts.
A very thought inducing piece... I see a man that would sacrifice all he has for the woman he loves including dying for her... that what a real man is made of... Great work!!
I love the open ended nature of the conclusion. The story is obviously overshadowed by the noose... much lies in the shadows untold... Cleverly done. Really fine work ... as always. I always know I am in for a treat when I peek into your section of the Cafe. Cheers.
So I reckon the story goes that a man and woman are together. He causes her great misery and harm and is only saved by another who hears of this. She has placed an add in the lonely hearts column of a newspaper. Slowly through a series of intimate letters he begins to understand the trauma she is going through and vows to rid the world of this man. She, though, knows nothing of this until the day of reckoning. Having gone out one afternoon, on her return she finds her man dead. The police are called and eventually the investigation leads to one person - her pen pal. She has never been in contact with him other than by mail and is shocked at the revelation. Finally when they get to meet, she thanks him and they make love. But, he is caught in this moment of passion, and led out to be hung for commiting such a murderous act.
Oooo just loved this, very original my friend (as always)
Let me start by saying I really loved;
"The greatest journey in life
is the distance two stranger's
hearts are willing to travel to fall in love"
This makes me wonder if the character isn't dying to go meet his love, rather than physically dying for her in the whole sense of the word or it could just be my overactive imagination getting the better of me. Over analyzing the real meaning in this piece and what possibly have happened in the beginning.
Hmmm, so many scenarios, so little space in this mind of mine. Think I will keep them to myself for the moment seeing that this could take all day explaining what I really think happened here.
Brilliant piece Robert, this really does work well and I think you got the reaction you were looking for (from me anyway)
I just finished reading Amor-de-angel's and Captain Blackheart's poem as an answer to your question about the beginning here. They both did an amazing job and as I read your poem, I can visualize the imagined prior events leading up to this. Your writing is outstanding! Your words take over the feeling of this individual and what emotions! My mind is reeling from the fantastic visuals with both the poems.
Your words....
"tears in the eyes of strangers
and bystanders
as an innocent man
is sent to meet his maker "
...with them you show the pain and what a tragedy. You remind us that innocent men are wronged all over the world. Very striking writing!
My name is Robert. I write therefore I feel I am. My words come from my heart, soul, and mind. I write what I feel and see, life is my inspiration. Life itself is art in its purest form. There is noth.. more..