Loneliness

Little disturbs the silence of my solitude

As loneliness engulfs me

As visible, as palpable

as any fog anyone ever saw.

 

It soaks into my soul;

It distorts and clouds my vision.

I can't see people and things.

I can't see life clearly, realistically.

Loneliness constrains me

and prevents others from seeing me.

 

Sometimes, sometimes the sun of another's kindness,

Of a kindness I have done to them, burns through

And surely as the sun will rise tomorrow,

I know it will again.

But tonight--tonight's a chilly, gloomy night.

I find no comfort or warmth.

Reviews

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

You did a very good job summing up the feelin gof loneliness. My favorite parts are these:
1. Sometimes, sometimes the sun of another's kindness,
Of a kindness I have done to them, burns through
2. It soaks into my soul;
It distorts and clouds my vision.

[Jennie Baron]

Thanks very much, Hobbit. Your words are much appreciated!

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Jennie Baron,
How precious is the human soul. We are so deep! Our storehouse within is where we live and process this life and we are so intense of response. Oh, loneliness, I wish it was not something which visited anyone. Silence, solitude, engulfs, palpable, soaks, distorts can't see people and things or life clearly, realistically, constrains me, prevents other from seeing me." And of so much more...........But the ending is the bright hope! Sun of another's kindness........burns through......sun will rise tomorrow. You have brought me light ........Thank you so much! Also the word repeats.- sometimes and tonight. So definitive to the story. You had to of put much thought into this poem. Well done. Kathy

[Jennie Baron]

Kathy, your reading and kind review are much appreciated. I'm with you, I wish no one had to experience loneliness. I"m so honored if you found this uplifting. And yes, the repetition was very deliberate but I liked it!

[Kathy Van Kurin]

I love to see people really enjoy the creative process as you do. Me too!

[Sami Khalil]

Honest and straightforward with clearly defines loneliness and that glimmer of hope that keep the vision alive for a better time and day. Like I say every moment is an opportunity...Excellent...:).................

[Jennie Baron]

I'm so honored and pleased that you liked this. It's a revised concept that I wrote down many years ago, but it's so much better now. Thanks a million!

[Sami Khalil]

Wow. You are welcome. ....:)))))

[Jack Kennedy]

This is like a standard bearer for the type of writing I try to make and aspire to make. I really enjoyed this poem, and use it as a blueprint of sorts. Very insightful

[Jennie Baron]

Many thanks for the good word, Jack! There's no greater compliment than to have your work used as an example. This one has undergone some tweaking but was started long ago when I was going through something of a dark time. I guess you can tell it's somewhat different than my usual sunny love poems.

[Beccy]

We can sometimes feel lonely even when surrounded by close friends and family. It's actually inexplicable how this can be really, but introspection is a strange being.

Periods of solitude are often a balm to the soul, but in the end, we all need someone.

Beccy.

[Jennie Baron]

That's exactly what I wanted to convey, along with that note of hope at the end. I so appreciate your reading!

[Rene Salinas]

I declare from the start I am lost, I know what the title says I have read, I know what you may be trying to convey but I just don't get it. And help I need so I will lay the questions and let them be.
It seems you are able to listen to your silence which is sign of self reflection or introspection which implies that your are not alone rihgt?
At every line every description a clear attempt to unite and take in what is infront of you and if the bridges are created they go from you to the " subject" which makes me think you are not alone right?
Then you let us know how this impacts your soul and how it impacts the subjects from seeing you not so lonely then or not?
And then there is a certain sense of empathy towards what the future may bring and it doesn't feel lonely to me or does it?

I tell you want I read here: THE VOICE OF ONE CRYING IN THE WILDERNESS, 'MAKE READY THE WAY...
with a tinge of humour then maybe you have been baptized in the redemption because ans this is where I can relate to you maybe, sometimes standing for what you believe means standing alone

Thankyou Jennie

[Jennie Baron]

Interesting perspective, Rene. I wrote this a long time ago when I was probably less adept at expression through writing, and it's undergone some changes. Yes, I was trying to convey the feeling of being "alone in a crowd" and thought the metaphor was apt. You got the part about not seeming to fit in. Also, I believed that loneliness is a vicious circle, and the deeper it gets, the more isolated and more "invisible" to others we are. Maybe that explains better? It just occurred to me that maybe I was even describing depression. But yes, since then I've developed a much more optimistic outlook and an ability to look beyond the immediate situation.

Thanks again for your thoughts. Let me know if you have suggestions for improvement.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

sometimes being alone is a good thing, there is solitude.
i am a homebody...i like my solitude, people ask me if i am lonely...i say often, no, even if i am alone, i am not lonely...
but you have so aptly describe that other feeling...and it is one that engulfs us sometimes like a fog...we get weighed down with the idea that nobody really cares about us, that we don't really matter to others in the scheme of things...and that is Lonely...
i think poets feel it often because we are so different from others...we get that feeling of not fitting in.
and there is little comfort or warmth in that feeling.

[Jennie Baron]

Exactly right, Jacob. You get my meaning spot on. Even though when I began this I was young and not so articulate.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

more articulate than you give yourself credit for being, my friend.

[Jennie Baron]

Well, thank you so much!

[NoelHC]

So well expressed, and such an insight into how loneliness affects a person. There is a glimmer of hope, "But tonight--tonight's a chilly, gloomy night." Well done.

[Jennie Baron]

Thank you so much, Noel! I appreciate the review.

[MAC]

oh to shut yourself off from the world, tis has always been my best writing technique. sometimes creates a harsh life but always creates a great poem. excellent write!

[Jennie Baron]

It's an old poem reworked and was first written when my life was indeed harsher. Glad you liked it.