The Devil himself

thinking about the battle for my life back in 09'

cancer

a frightening word but….

until you encounter the beast on a personal level

is just that

a word.

 

"you have cancer"

a phrase i will not soon forget

imagery of tombstones and white calla lilies

flood my mind

 

am i going to die?

what am i going to do?

what about my family!

 

questions, questions

so many questions

 

teams of doctors gathered to tend to my health

Oncologist, Radiation Oncologist, primary care doc and a Pediatrician  

my own personal cancer board to discuss the rarity of my beast

 

poking and prodding

tissue, bone and blood samples

port instillation

you want to install what?!

 

a plan put in motion

forty three weeks of chemotherapy once a week

including seven long weeks of daily radiation to the pelvis

 

chemo started off not too bad

stabbed in the chest to receive the lifesaving poison

filtered through my heart to protect my fragile veins

 

then came radiation….

 

most disregard the term as just an x-ray

however

do not be mistaken

this is the same type of radiation

an atomic bomb produces

 

radiation burns

my skin cooks internally

first the appearance of a minor sunburn

then blisters

next pain

and finally no skin to be had

 

my tissue sloughed off

my bone marrow collapsed

blood transfusions

colonic ileus 

just some of my side effects

 

vomiting

hospitalization

cant eat

tired of being sick

 

almost done

treatment is harder

the finish line is close

 

then

 

success

no cancer detected

the disease

eradicated

 

for me, cancer is well known

the devil himself

that I fought and won

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

This is your story, so I'll not go into detail about my own long struggle with a life-threatening health problem. I'll just say that I understand. Life sometimes throws us into that ring where we must fight for our lives against an enemy from within. I don't know about you, but I could do without it. If there's anything positive to say about such struggles, it may be that they make us stronger or "adjusts" our attitude about certain things.

[Sway]

"Adjust" that is definitely one word to describe what happens after cancer. My internal filter broke post illness and I have a very low tolerance for BS. The typical in and out of daily life can be mundane. Life is worth living and I try very hard to actually do that. LIVE!

[Sway]

Cancer stinks but I am living proof that it doesn't always win! Sending positive vibes to you and yours

[Corset]

Congratulations! How wonderful for you to be free of that horrendous word, My father has it, I have to admit I'm scared as hell, please excuse language, so frighting for everyone. I am sorry to read about your pain and suffering but I am ecstatic to hear of your recovery! :) :) it gives me hope!!