The Ballerina in the Jewelry Box

The Ballerina in the Jewelry Box

A Poem by Julianna Marie

I woke up
and I was home,
but not in a childhood sense.
There was no one next to me,
there was no one,
but I was home.

Like that time you woke up in the hospital bed
and couldn't decide if that was what
you wanted---
Like the way in which you felt
as if you were always
on the verge
of waking up.

With a name that promised failure,
with a name that promised you would die
young and beautiful,
The way in which you'd always ask,
"Where's your guillotine necklace, princess?"

Locked doors and Friday nights,
it was 3 AM and you felt "sorry;"
There was a mysterious reservoir of tears
always flooding our backyard,
your hegemonies trying to float along to mine to bring them flowers
because they were tired of sleeping on the couch,
your hegemonies knowing nothing of communication except to ask,
"Where's your guillotine necklace, princess?"

Do I really need a childhood that leaves my heart full of paper?
Did I really need a house that kept breaking its right arm by slipping in the slow?
Do I really need a name that promises nothing but maggots in my memory?

There was a lackluster shine to me since '93,
memorizing my address and learning not to cry,
looking for loose limbs and split ends,
looking for gremlin scratches on your door,
looking for Medusa's kiss on my forehead,
turning to paper,
to mirrors,
to flooded backyards,
turning from your hegemonies,
whilst feeling the singe in my veins
of blood that could never be changed.

I was a ballerina in a jewelry box,
constantly spinning to the same song--
It's 3 AM and I feel sorry,
but the music never stops.

© 2011 Julianna Marie


Author's Note

Julianna Marie
unfinished

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Featured Review

Once more I am nonplussed by the nuances,
the symbolism the hidden meanings, but
I am entranced by the virtuosity, the obvious
talent of this writer.
Her gifted writing transcends culture, beauty
and spirit. She lives and breathes excellence.
----- Eagle Cruagh

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

How beautiful and enchant the ballerina is to the untrained eye....confined idle and alone in the darkness. Yet, she found a way to heal the world around her. I now wonder if she ever made anyone happy...or if she simply absorbed their pain.

It is said that a house is not a home, but I've never seen a home that seemed to simply be a house. This poem brought it to my attention that the desensitization to your emotions can allow the distancing of one's self without notice. There is a release of tension that is powerful beyond words, but the lack of closure is what gives it it's bite. It's beautiful art...beautiful heartbreaking art, but brought imagery that put me into a dream state.

With the depth of this work...I must revisit in a few days.....100% sure to find many other insights to introduce themselves.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Once more I am nonplussed by the nuances,
the symbolism the hidden meanings, but
I am entranced by the virtuosity, the obvious
talent of this writer.
Her gifted writing transcends culture, beauty
and spirit. She lives and breathes excellence.
----- Eagle Cruagh

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on September 4, 2011
Last Updated on October 1, 2011

Author

Julianna Marie
Julianna Marie

Seattle, WA



About
I'm a 21 year old girl living in Seattle, student/poet/barista. I believe in art, poetry, psychology, and music-- I don't think its safe to believe in much else. more..

Writing

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