Splish Splash

Splish Splash

A Poem by MsJewel
"

~ a rainy spring afternoon fantasy ~

"

photograph compliments of pinterest

 

 

 

The soft pitter patter of spring rain

is the perfect compliment

to an April afternoon

 

A gift of love

for the beauty of the earth

and a beautiful field of daisies

and a poet who dreams of flying…

 

If I could paint you a rainbow

with the colors of my love

I would….

 

If my heart had wings

 

Yes,

I love the spring rain

© 2014 MsJewel


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Featured Review

A simple concept, but one which almost everyone would relate; who doesn't enjoy the early rain? The smell and feeling of petrichor, as the earth lets loose her hidden blood. The only part of this that I think has an issue is the second stanza; you repeat 'and', usually we add more ands than we need and it makes our writing stagnant. In fact, usually we can remove it without even replacing it! I also recommend varying your word choice for 'beauty' since you repeat it as well. And honestly, while beauty is a great idea, the word is so overused that it has lost much of its magic. I recommend trying to use metaphors here to make the sentences more powerful and more unique; after all, the first word people think of when they see a field of flowers is 'beautiful', choose something less predictable. Good Luck!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

9 Years Ago

Thank you for sharing some great ideas. I do tend to use the word beauty or beautiful too often. I.. read more
MsJewel

9 Years Ago

oopps...did it again. Have a fabulous day! stunning, lovely....LOL...
:)
Nusquam Esse

9 Years Ago

*cough* Ostentatious Occasions I do say, I mean... Indubitably... :P



Reviews

A beautiful poem for the warm rain. I need a warm Spring day. Photo and words made me wish for a tropical place. Thank you dear Poet for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

9 Years Ago

Thank you for your kind words. Hurry spring! :) Julie
Coyote Poetry

9 Years Ago

I agree and you are welcome.
╰☆╮This is so sweet. I'm not a huge fan of rain, but sometimes I find it nice. Also, I love the font you used here. It fits perfectly with the piece. Great poem!╰☆╮

Posted 9 Years Ago


A simple concept, but one which almost everyone would relate; who doesn't enjoy the early rain? The smell and feeling of petrichor, as the earth lets loose her hidden blood. The only part of this that I think has an issue is the second stanza; you repeat 'and', usually we add more ands than we need and it makes our writing stagnant. In fact, usually we can remove it without even replacing it! I also recommend varying your word choice for 'beauty' since you repeat it as well. And honestly, while beauty is a great idea, the word is so overused that it has lost much of its magic. I recommend trying to use metaphors here to make the sentences more powerful and more unique; after all, the first word people think of when they see a field of flowers is 'beautiful', choose something less predictable. Good Luck!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

9 Years Ago

Thank you for sharing some great ideas. I do tend to use the word beauty or beautiful too often. I.. read more
MsJewel

9 Years Ago

oopps...did it again. Have a fabulous day! stunning, lovely....LOL...
:)
Nusquam Esse

9 Years Ago

*cough* Ostentatious Occasions I do say, I mean... Indubitably... :P
Oh this is so fabulous, I love the rain, I could watch it for hours… your poem is so eloquent, blissful and has such a carefree attitude. I so love your poetry.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

9 Years Ago

Thank you my dear friend. I love the rain as well..unfortunately we haven't had much of it this year.. read more
The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)

9 Years Ago

I know we haven't either, thank you for blessing us with your beautiful thoughts.
Something refreshing about it, isn't there? You do such vision immense justice...brings a whole new feeling to April showers - makes them achingly pleasurable! x

Posted 10 Years Ago


I love spring and summer I live in Wisconsin and it's beautiful how the four seasons change we just had a long winter it's just now starting to be nice yea!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

10 Years Ago

Enjoy your beautiful weather! :) Julie
star73

10 Years Ago

oh most certain it's sad when we have long winter's gets depressing.
Such a beautiful write. We have clouds here in Phoenix ... and it smells of distant rain, but it looks like dust is all we will get. ~Jim

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

10 Years Ago

Thank you :) Julie
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B.J
Such dreams of a spring day. The love of spring is beautiful around the world. I enjoy your work it is as lovely as spring

Posted 10 Years Ago


MsJewel

10 Years Ago

Thanks so much Barb! :) Julie
B.J

10 Years Ago

Your welcome
I like this poem. a spring rain, unlike winter rain can be beautiful. people are accustomed to beautiful sunsets and flowers and butterflies in poetry. this brings to mind: I am singing in the rain.
beautiful poem.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

10 Years Ago

Thank you for your lovely comment :) Julie
Woody

10 Years Ago

pleasure. I enjoyed it :)
Ah, a nice spring shower. Little is more pleasing than a gentle rain from heaven. Lovely:)

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

MsJewel

10 Years Ago

Thank you :) Julie

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1427 Views
31 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on April 9, 2014
Last Updated on April 9, 2014
Tags: spring, rain, love, fantasy, rainbows, msjewel, poetry

Author

MsJewel
MsJewel

The Beach, CA



About
I've been writing poetry for 15 years. My poetry isn't unique in any way, but it is written from the heart. I have trouble keeping up with everyone's poetry, so please send me rr's. I enjoy rec.. more..

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