Thomas DeRay Cameron

Remembering Thomas.

   When I hear Thomas’ name, I instantly think of his mischievous smile and his laugh. He used to call me Mrs. Giggles until I dubbed him as my spouse. After that we just called each other Giggles.

   He had issues with saying, "I love you," even to family members. When he would tell me, it was always something like, "I heart you." It isn’t that he never said it – it’s just that I wish he’d said it more. Honestly, I never really needed to hear him say it because I knew that he did. When we started dating, we heard a lot of things from other people about him being black and me being white. He’d call me crying and ask me what I thought we should do. I told him if we broke up we’d only be doing what they wanted. So we ended up staying together, and despite all the things people said, it was worth it.

   Thomas loved life and made it well known. I can count on one hand the number of times I saw him not smiling. We went bowling once and we put the bumpers up on our lane so that neither of us could get gutter balls. Thomas would still get so excited when he knocked a couple of pins down and would celebrate by jumping up and down, pumping his fist into the air, and cheering at the top of his lungs. We’d race go karts and he would knock me off the road, send my car spinning, and laugh maniacally as he drove past.

   I did not attend his funeral to say goodbye, because I don’t believe that it is. I went to say that I’d see him soon and I hoped he would save me a seat. Just by knowing him he helped me learn a lot of things about myself. By being close to him he helped me to get over fears and thoughts I had so often. I don’t think of him as dead now. He’s only just started to live.

Author's Note

An English teacher at our school called our local newspaper and wanted to know if they would let students write about their memories of Thomas and put them in the paper. This is what I wrote.