Unsure

Thinking back into the past when I had just found out I was pregnant, and expressing how I felt up until this point. This has not been read through but twice, so kindly let me know of mistakes.

I cannot bring myself to say that they were a mistake-

Because surely, they were not.

But there, that day, I WAS afraid.

With the two lines, came many thoughts.

 

I stood, shaking, in the bathroom, waiting.

My hands clasped onto the plastic.

Nothing could have prepared me for the news.

I was too scared to feel anything pass that.

 

I was even unsure of my partner,

Of the guy who I had made a father-

What would I tell him to make this better?

He had never intended to make me a mother…

 

And so I had walked in,

My heart a beating wreck.

I turned to him with fearful eyes,

The sleeves of my shirt hiding the stick.

 

I was not sure of what to say.

Yet somehow I found the words-

And there, on that day…

We both became unsure.

 

The shakes had not ceased,

And he had pulled me into his arms.

I remember being reassured,

But I had felt that I had done him harm.

 

I was sure he had never thought of kids.

At least, not at his age.

He was usually noncommitting-

Wanting to wait for the proper stage.

 

But somehow, although unsure…

I had felt safe.

There was something about the way he held me-

The way he told me it would be okay.

 

Week by week, I tracked the progress.

At first, I felt detached.

Every second I paused to think,

I felt the need to apologize.

 

I was sorry that our child was conceived.

That this meant the end to his carefree life.

I was sorry that I had screwed things up-

But I did not regret our nights.

 

Yet every time I opened my mouth,

If it were to apologize once more…

He quickly would shut me down.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

 

And as the time had passed,

As I watched our baby grow…

Things became much more complex,

More thoughts began to show.

 

With little limbs, and organs,

Came much more than I would have thought.

Although I was scared at first,

Happiness dwells within the thought.

 

As the months have passed,

My eyes have opened more.

Those nights were not mistakes,

Because they’ve opened up a door.

 

Maybe it was unexpected,

But the happiness was, too.

I could never regret those choices, though-

For they made a dream come true.

 

Sometimes the future

Comes from unexpected things.

I have learned that through the fear,

Brings on the best of new beginnings.

 

And though at a time,

We both were quite unsure-

We know we are where we want to be,

And that is with her.

Reviews

[Justin]

that was very great :) :) :) u were able to take something so personal and turn into a piece of art, the set up was perfect, it was very emotional, u were able to talk about all the problems and things that go along with being pregnant, great job :)

[Kaitlyn Raiford]

Thank you! I was struggling to write something pertaining to the topic but I feel this came out nicely.

[Justin]

your welcome, it came out really good, sometimes struggling to write something makes it all worth it, at the end of the day :) :)