Bikini Ninja

Young lady decides to fight crime. Inspired to do this Ninja style but it's too hot to wear a Ninja outfit, the solution.....wear a bikini....but keep the Ninja hood!

RISE OF THE BIKINI NINJA

By K.Herzog

 

“Katrina”

 

Scurrying through the busy college corridors, Katrina cringed and held her folder tightly to her chest.  She hated being called by her lengthened name but could hear the voice was coming from her good friend Natalie who was too cute to stay angry at.

 

Nat caught up with her and gently touched Kat on her right shoulder.

 

“Andy was assaulted on the way home last night!”

 

She blurted.  Kat leaned back as if literally blown.  She pushed up her stylish black rimmed glasses onto her face as she did when caught off guard.

 

“What happened!?”

 

Nat clutched her folders to her denim overall clad chest.  Nat was deliberately going went for the cute country girl look despite she was born in the city.

 

“Andy was walking home from the Talent Show Rehearsal and was attacked in the underpass near the shopping centre.”

 

“Was it by someone at the rehearsals?  Did he play the kazoo?  I keep telling him people aren’t ready for that…”

 

Nat cut her off and explained what she knew.

 

Andy was playing the guitar at rehearsals which didn’t finish until late.  The college was near his home, so he walked.  Walking past the shopping centre to the east of the college meant enduring a gauntlet of insults by the college gang of Spice Girl wannabe’s and their football fanatic boyfriends.  This one-time Andy had the nerve for a witty come back, result was to be chased and yelled at by the angry Spice Girl Gang and eventually beaten to the ground by their boyfriends who resembled shave gorillas.

 

“He’s in the hospital with a COMA!!  Well…. he’s got a concussion.”

 

Kat found Natalie’s compassion adorable but knew she was being a bit melodramatic.  Despite that, this was serious, and it made her angry that someone would do that to one of her friends.

 

Kat continued her Friday at college feeling angry, frustrate and helpless.  So far, the bullies hadn’t targeted Kat but assaulting one of her friends was bad enough.  Kat wanted to do something.

 

Her classes ended, Kat walked home thinking about what to do.  This occupied her mind during her afternoon run, dinner, evening exercise, shower, meditation and while watching the news.  Kat rubbed her flat belly and noticed the abdominal muscles.  She was eighteen and only just noticed how fit she was.  Kat laughed, it was obvious; years of training in Tae Kwon Do and being a sportswear model, she’d have to be fit.  Kat never really appreciated it until then.  Sitting drinking coffee in front of her laptop with the news on, Kat’s thoughts were distracted by local news reports about a gang of youths going around her neighbourhood at night randomly assaulting people.

 

“Ergh!  In comes the summer madness.”

 

Kat’s favourite past time was to walk the suburbs late at night during spring, it was nice enough to walk outside without a jacket.  But as the summer came and school holidays emerging, other kids would be out late and getting up to mischief.  Kat remembers her last night stroll she was startled by a man jumping out of the bushes from the side of the footpath, binoculars around his neck, pulling his underpants, denim shorts and doing up his studded belt.  The man saw Kat but just stared at her with a dopey look in his face.

 

‘Obvious what he was up to.’

 

Kat went spinning around on her heels and walking very quickly home.

 

More news reports about violence in her neighbourhood bought her back to the present.

 

‘I exercise a lot, I try to eat healthy, I’ve been training in martial arts for years why can’t I do something about this!?’

 

She thought to herself remembering her friend in hospital.  Her thoughts were disrupted by the alarm on her computer, Kat glanced at the tiny digital clock on the bottom left screen of her black laptop.

 

“Has it been an hour already?”

 

Kat was going to set her alarm for another hour of study time but didn’t.

 

‘I can’t take studying anymore tonight.  It’s late, Friday, can’t concentrate, too pissed off…’

 

Despite her academic looks Kat wasn’t an intellectual, but she could pull off the ‘sexy librarian look.’  This got her into modelling, she was ‘luke-warm’ about it but was told by her mother, teachers, classmates and report cards that she was good looking and too dumb for anything else.  Kat went into modelling at sixteen and the most tolerable work she got out of it was wearing sports-gear in catalogues for Rebel Sport, Surf Dive and Ski, Natural Necessity, Target, K-Mart Big W and Aldi’s.  She didn’t always get paid in time, but the money was good.  Still Kat wished she was a genius.

 

It was late, Kat was still upset about the assault on her friend.  She decides to relax by watching an old movie she loved as a child…. American Ninja 2.

 

Time passed by and Kat’s mind wandered from the movie to thoughts of revenge on the people who attacked her friend.  She knew where they hanged out and at what time.  Looking at the clock on the screen.

 

‘Hmmmm it’s 11:48pm, sure they’d still be there!’

 

Kat thought to herself.  She jumped up from her desk, office chair still spinning as Kat raced to her wardrobe and looked at her Tae Kwon Do uniform.

 

‘It’s bright white, no way is that camouflage at night.’

 

The obvious choice was the poorly made Ninja costume her mother made for Halloween…. years ago.  Kat frantically put it on and to her frustration it didn’t fit properly.  The only thing that worked out was the hood.  Being that it was summer Kat felt it was too hot to wear the outfit anyway.  It was then she spied the black bikini she wore once.

 

‘It’s not practical but it would throw my opponent off guard.’

 

Kat laughed to herself as before she realised, she took off her nerdy glasses and tied her hair into a low bun and was stripping off the purple tartan gym shorts and black roller derby singlet.  Tying the bandana and the face mask, Kat walked back across the cool vinyl floor and reached the top of her rickety, cheap, woodchip desk at the sword stand that sadly only had one wooden, Katana or bokken as it was officially called. 

 

‘I can wing this.’

 

Kat wasn’t good at school or sport, but she loved her martial arts and was good at that.  She only knew a bit about sword fighting but with her skill and motivation Kat was feeling VERY confident.

 

‘Those bullies wouldn’t know what hit them.’

 

Her advantage was that Kat was always well behaved and passive, so no one would suspect she did it.

 

Before you know it, Kat was wearing her black bikini, Black Tae Kwon Do belt with Bokken securely tucked in and Ninja hood on her head.  Sneaking out her bedroom door, up the edges of the hallway, cautious about her parent’s bedroom behind her at the bottom of the hall.  She exits the hall and creeped across the dining room towards the glass sliding door and managed to quietly slide it open then quietly walk across the patio and exit the gate without a racket.

 

‘Don’t know why I bother sneaking around.  Half the time my family don’t hear me any.’

 

Sneaking out of the house and down the driveway was child’s play, literally speaking.  Kat done this plenty of times as a child.  During childhood Kat’s dad introduced her to B-Grade martial art films.  Rainy days were spent on the living room floor drawing pictures of Ninja’s while watching an old Kung Fu film.

Her mum didn’t approve and felt that.

 

“Young girls shouldn’t like that sort of thing.”

 

But dad ignored her and introduce Kat to the world of Martial Arts.  In a way her mother was proud for ten years of training in Tae Kwon Do was the one thing Kat was good at and her mother started to see the benefits.

 

Quietly running along the nature strip beside the footpath, Kat stuck to the shadows of the trees and fences.  The occasional dog would bark but Kat wouldn’t stick around long enough to be spotted.  She ran as fast and quietly as she could and was doing it well.  Being the nice, quiet girl, she was aware this was a break in her character but to Kat she felt justified and could imagine people would sympathise if they knew about the ‘Spice Girl Gang’ and their two years of bullying.  Also, it was a new and exciting experience, the adrenaline rush outweighed the fear of being caught or the spider web she just ran through.

 

Kat slowed to a jog as she approached the West entry of the underpass the gang would hang out at.  Every Friday night they would hang out on the East entrance waiting long hours into the night for anyone to walk through, they would attack them and steal their money.  It’s amazing they got away with it for so long because it was common knowledge.  Kat jogged until she could her the ‘Footy Bogans’ laughing.  She angled off to the right and crept up towards the right side of the underpass where she couldn’t be seen.  Crouching in the bushes that grew out of the cracks of the mortar and grey stones, to Kat’s right the railing of the bridge.  Kat listened and heard the blatancy of her enemy.  They are bragging about assaulting her friend.  Wooden sword securely tucked into her black Tae Kwon Do belt, Kat grabbed it with her right and turned facing the road, she gripped the railing with her left hand and slung herself over, landing on the hard, warm, asphalt road.  Kat sprint across the road to the East entry of the tunnel.  She could see one of the spice girls sitting below.  One of the Footy Bogans heard Kat running.

 

“What was that?”

 

 

Acting fast, Kat got to the other side of the road, grabbed the grey, metal railing with her left hand and again slung herself down, left foot stretched out like in a flying kick.  It landed on the back of one of the spice girls, the sporty one who had very short shorts, a sports bra and her football boyfriends red and black flannel shirt.  ‘Sporty’ stayed where she landed, rolling around in pain.  Kat landed backwards on the grey, rocky hillside of the tunnel entry way, which hurt more since she was in a bikini.  But the anger and adrenaline outweighed the scratches and bruises.  The joy of seeing ‘Bratty Sporty Spice’ landing face first onto the footpath was worth Kat’s own mundane injuries.

 

‘This is must be how Berserkers must’ve felt…. with fighting in the nude and all.’

 

Kat thought as she awkwardly pulled out her dark brown Bokken from her belt with her right hand and just as ‘Ginger Spice’ smashed a glass bottle of VB, ran over and was about to smash the jagged bottle down into Kat’s black, Ninja clad face.  Kat swung the sword up and down in an arch hitting Ginger’s wrist.  Ginger scream and clasped her right wrist, letting go of the broken bottle.  Kat brought the sword up and down onto the very top of Ginger’s dyed red hair, with the black under-roots showing.  Kat knows from experience how much that hurt and took delight in seeing her fall to her knees and roll onto her side.

 

But there were three more Spice Girls to go and their Football Bogan boyfriends who were still stoned and trying to figure out if this was real.  Reality kicked in and all seven of them got to Kat as she jumped to her feet.  Two of the Spice Girls grabbed an arm each as ‘Girly Spice’ Went to the help of her friend on the footpath.  Ginger’s mullet haired boyfriend went to help her up, the rest smashed their bottles of VB.  That was the moment a slender but muscular, tanned man in kung Fu shoes, black speedo’s and a ninja hood jumped out of the bushes adjacent to Kat.  He had a stick and he knew how to use it!  Twirling it he smacked the Mullet Head on the side of the temple, knocking him to the ground.  Then he took out the two blokes threatening Kat by hitting them on the corner of their eyebrow’s, left to right like a pin ball.  Kat cringed a bit as she knows how that feels.  The bogans dropped to the ground hands on their foreheads as they suffered a very bad migraine.  Their eyes watered, and they tried walking away but staggered like they just went on a roller coaster ride.

Mullet Head grabbed Ginger and staggered off with her, probably the most noble thing he’s ever done.  The ‘Posh Spice’ who was consoling her friend on the rocky, grey, angled walls of the footpath looked up.  Dangling gold earrings swinging and flicking her neck length black hair to reveal a racoon looking face, due to too much make up.  She turns and tip toed quickly away, she’d run but was wearing thick, high-healed shoes.  That’s when Kat dropped her Bokken and used her self defence techniques to loosen the grip of the remaining two spice girls.

 

The last two staggered away swearing and moaning.  While Kat and the hero in speedos ran together.  As soon as they reached the pine forest nature strip at the back of an quiet, suburban shopping centre.  They faced each other and without thinking took off their masks revealing their faces.

 

“Ken the Barbie Doll!?”

 

“Oh my God, Kat!?  Wait…. what did you just call me.?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s just that I know you from college and you’re in my model agency.  We worked together on photo shoots for catalogues.  I didn’t know you’re name so just called you ‘Ken the Barbie Doll’….no offence.”

 

The Josh Hartnett look alike just laughed it off.

 

They both spent and amazing amount of time talking in the nature strip with the surreal glow of a neon sign for the supermarket in the distance to Kats left.  In the distance to the right were sleepy houses.  Neither one of them cared as most of the houses were empty due to the families being away for Christmas.

 

There was an obvious rapport followed by an awkward silence.  Kat stood with her arms clasped behind her back, right foot pointing at Ken, a huge smile on her face as she stared at him and rocked her body side to side.  Ken saw the signs and he started to blush as he realised, he was inadvertently copying her body language.  He broke the silence.

 

“So, what gave you the idea to fight crime in a Ninja hood…and a bikini.”

 

Ken nervously swallowed as he looked down Kat’s cleavage, abdominal muscles and bikini briefs.  He felt awkward as he was obviously attracted to her and trying not to look.  Kat knew, and she laughed it off.

 

“probably the same thing that gave you the idea to fight crime in speedos.”

 

She laughed harder as it dawned on Ken how exposed he was.  Kat smiled and bit her lower lip as she looked Ken up and down.  He wasn’t big but athletic and had abdominal muscles she could probably use as a 19^th century wash board.

 

“I like Ninja stuff, I have kung Fu skills, I got tired of the Spice Girl Gang and their Footy Bogan boyfriends.  I heard they assaulted that poor guy who seemed nice and thought I’d start fighting back.  I have a Ninja outfit but…. it’s too hot to wear.”

 

Kat laughed as she found it amusing that Ken thought the same as her.  They talked more but before they knew it Kat was walking Ken home and they were arm in arm.  Not being very stealthy but no one was around to make a fuss.

 

And so, the two united to fight crime at night but only during the summer holidays because it was too hot to wear a complete Ninja outfit.