A Poem by Kathleen Cavender

My husband was diagnosed with a terminal disease and I became lost for just a minute. I'm okay now.


I am tracing back my footsteps

To discern the dappled trail
That has led to this arrangement
Exploratory every hour
Sliding fingertips on leaf skins
Analyzing misty thoughts 
Was it warm breath on my neck
With dreams of gardenscapes?
Or eyes turned onto mine
With familiar soft restraint?
Why turn my head so simply?
Was there something more to say?
Was that the bed of my beloved
Has been stolen from beneath
By a devil on a dry wind
Whose bones turn tissue white?
His shards of death still hanging
Like cold and broken glass
A war rages in heaven
For him, for you, for me
The arrows burrow deeply
The cry too loud to hear
Transparent flesh no fortress
I am blinded on my knees
Were that I could govern time
I would paint you more my brother
Restore my lover’s breath
We would run this race as one
Would again to find my freedom
Kiss his brow, kiss yours, kiss mine
But distain for the future holds me
Discontent within my shell
With my talents failing comfort
And Love misrepresenting its way
I resist hearing its passion
Left hungry for something pure
So today brings only anguish
For all that hangs below the air
I search for something holy
But stumble awkward with unease
Like a kite that has no anchor
A leaf spinning on the brook

© 2008 Kathleen Cavender

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The power of the heart is such that when it speaks its truth we are humbled by its honesty.

This poem is a vessel of emotion an cathartic cultivation. I found it powerful and filled with illuminating insights. Even in our darkest moments there is light , the road to heaven goes through hell and its those of us who see the beauty of what we have who make it to the other side.

Thank you for the miracle of this poem and for the loveliness of your soul. Your words are heartfelt and evocative. They are a literary sanctuary where sadness is transformed to something artistic and ethereal. My heart has felt this poem , my spirit has embraced it and my soul has understood it and is humbled by its sheer beauty.

Posted 15 Years Ago

This was a very emotional read. Very well put together. It makes me want to reach out to you to comfort you, and you say you are okay now. That's all I can hope. I hope things are getting better, because this piece of writing is heartbreaking and surreal.
Very well done.


Posted 15 Years Ago

It was a nice read. Sad but kind of like it wasn't reality...as if the writer was in a dream-like state. The imagery was wonderful. Very exquisite.

Posted 15 Years Ago

this was a very nicely done read. i thought the meter worked well within it and i actually felt as if i was there. that is all a writer can hope for so you are well on your way

Posted 15 Years Ago

wonderful imagery. questioning, conjecturing, hypothesizing, analyzing, searching for truth, concluding with imagery of attitude today... a kite without anchor or a leaf spinning on the brook.
I enjoyed this. maybe you could title it "A leaf spinning on the brook" or "The search for something holy" There's a lot of beautiful titles in here.
Thanks for sharing the writing.

Posted 15 Years Ago

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5 Reviews
Added on March 19, 2008
Last Updated on March 19, 2008


Kathleen Cavender
Kathleen Cavender

Spokane, WA

I am a professional artist of the painting variety and a singer/song writer. I paint several hours each day and sell my work in art galleries and art museums. I have a blog (http://cavenderartstudio.b.. more..


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