A Friend Of A Foe

"Who is to be trusted?"

I heard she’s godly a genius type,

That with her I could attain the greatest height,

I took a step to give her a try,

That she could eventually help to change my very life.

With grinning and smile we exchange greetings

Like a true brother I gave her a kiss,

I said to myself that I’ve found a company,

That I’m no more alone to lay the bricks.

 

I got to trust her with all my heart.

I gave her the key to my inner mind.

Then, she used to try the best she can,

And it went so well with us together.

So soon, her nature began to speak.

And her act began to expose her identity.

But I was too blind with trust to perceive,

That all her life was full of deceit.

 

So deep was her mind that I couldn’t read,

Until she was almost gone with everything.

Now I know deception could hide in a man,

Yet with smile that won’t showcase it.

Now I’m duped and almost left with nothing,

Would I ever again ally with a man?

I think my mind still doubts it,

If I could ever find a better chance.

Author's Note

Just doubting who I have to trust.
How is this?

Reviews

[barleygirl]

People with bad intent often show us exactly who they are, but we refuse to see it or believe it. This is what your message seems to be saying to me. You describe how fiercely we struggle to believe a person is good, when they are showing us he/she is not. My only drawback to your poetry is that this sounds like you are TELLING more than SHOWING. Take the word "deception" in the last verse -- this can only be understood by THINKING what this general concept means. Another way to SHOW instead of tell is to use rich specific details to SHOW deception . . . use one bit of imagery that shows the reader this person is deceptive . . . how exactly did she fool this guy? I'm not saying to change this poem, a strong poem well-expressed & clear. I'm just saying this for future writings, you could use more imagery & details to paint a more vivid scene of how some vague concept like "deception" actually plays out in a person's life (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you very much for this wonderful review, Barley. It's really very helpful.
I've copied you advice and I'll adjust to it.
Thank you once again.

[Laura Kate]

It is hard to imagine that even some people we think we know really well, even those who we let into our homes, our beds, our hearts... they can deceive us. It is scary. This is why it is so important to pay attention to the signs and to listen to our gut. You ask some genuine questions which makes this piece seem quite endearing and vulnerable. This piece also works as a warning, Best wishes, Laura.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you very much, Laura.
It's quite difficult to know who is who in this world of deception. Someone just have to be very careful.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Interesting piece on trust and not rushing to trust too easily unless you are sure of someone. I enjoyed many of your lines. I wondered if the title was supposed to be "A Friend Or A Foe" ? I also became confused as the gender of your person who appears to be a woman for the first two stanzas and then a man in the final stanza, unless I am reading it wrong.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

The man I used in the final stanza actually represented human being as a whole.
I was really confused on else to trust. So, I have to generalized my feelings in my last statement.

Thank you very much for this wonderful review, John.

[Edie Blue Starfish]

I think it's wise to trust with caution when first meeting someone.
But sometimes we are just blind to certain people's faults.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Yes, you are right, Edie.
Sometime, we are just too blind to see.
Thank you for this wonderful review.

[Chris Shaw]

If you have suffered because of the deceit of others, it is difficult to know whom to trust. We tend to be extra careful, to prevent further hurt. A relatable and well written poem Kay. Only time will tell.

Chris

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you very much for this review, Chris.
Deception is what I found so rampant in our today's world. Nobody knows whom to trust.

[Jade]

A thought provoking piece here, I have trust issues myself, but then again we all do to an extent.
This is very good, I enjoyed reading this. Speaks in volumes and truth

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Seems like you read my mind. I've been disappointed many times. So I have hard time trusting people.
I was compelled to write this piece; seeing what is going on around and through my experience.

Thank you very much for this wonderful contribution, Brandie.
I really appreciate it.