My Hope

My Hope.

From my young age,

I've been dreaming,

Having visions,

Of the future.

With today's pain,

I've been grinning,

Knowing friction,

Assist mission.

Though the rough way,

Could be greasy,

But I won't stop,

Never give up.

I know one day,

I will be free,

When my dreams come,

To completion.

Author's Note

Until I get there!

What do you think?

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Before I get immersed in your msg & forget to mention your typography, let me say that you have a very good eye for page layout. I did page layout all my life & I like the way you use clear bold font when putting text atop a photo background (good visibility, text stands out without using bold garish fonts). Even the smallest details, like the amount of space you use between lines & between verses, it's all very balanced. You have a good natural eye for this.

The thing I like most about your msg is that you acknowledge that change & improving one's life is difficult & even as we vow to do better day by day, we are fighting against lots of things in life, and even basic inertia. As I told you before, I hate a big "rah! rah" pep talk. What makes your msg hit the mark is that you convey empathy as to how hard it can be to do what you're saying to do.

The thing I don't like about your msg is the ending. I do not believe that "dreams come to completion" . . . that sounds good, but it's not what really happens in life. As we go along, our dreams are constantly evolving becuz we are evolving into different people with different needs & goals. More than any one thing, I would say most people do not realize their own potential, so as we grow onward in living, we grasp our own potential more & more, growing into it, expanding our original concept of what we thought our dreams were. But for scratching the surface with a poem, your ending is just a bright yellow swish of paint & that's good, too! *wink! wink!* Fondly, Margie

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you very much, Margie.
Your powerful review is always an inspiration to me.
I'm encouraged.

[kentuck14]

Kay,
You express a positive view which is not always the hallmark of youth. "Friction . . . assisting mission" . . .
a good way of expressing a truth . . . spinning our wheels never gets us anywhere.
T

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Kentuck.
I realized that the more challenges we face the more, the more we grow in experience.

[Robert Trakofler]

Kay I pray that you keep that fire ablaze for many a day yet to come my friend! hold it close to you and nurture it, and with it.... yourself in the process! it is better to strive with bloody hands from breaking thru barricades and scraped raw from greasy uphill climbs than to stand aghast in acceptance. The trials are what makes the achievements taste all the more sweet good soul that you are!

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Yeah!
This means a lot to me, Robert.
Thank you so much for your encouragement.

[Robert Trakofler]

you in turn encourage me with your words it is nice to see a consonant soul pushing his young mind to great heights gives an old soul like mine a taste of hope