what you are to me <3

what you are to me <3

A Poem by Kelso

this is your answer


you ask me what you are to me

you ask me why i love you so much

you want to know what i see when i see you


your touch, leaves me begign for more

your breath, keeps my heart racing

your eyes, give me comfort

your arms, are my shelter

your lips, touch mine

your fingers, trace circles

your chest, is my pilow

your voice, gives me butterflies

your hair, so soft


© 2010 Kelso

My Review

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. . . okay, I'm assuming you're new. This is nice, don't get me wrong, but it's rather bland. Starting with "you" and "your" might be creative, but your over-repetative use of them isn't earning you any points with this poem.

My suggestion is to add more meat to this poem. Use a stanza to describe each charactersitic (touch, breath, eyes) as well as cut back on those you can't describe very well. Overall though, keep it up. That's the only way you'll get better.

Posted 13 Years Ago

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1 Review
Added on March 23, 2010
Last Updated on March 23, 2010



im an 18 year old girl who is very interested in writing more..

your the one your the one

A Poem by Kelso

my life my life

A Poem by Kelso