What I've Learned From Love So Far

What I've Learned From Love So Far

A Story by kenny

So I've tried the whole movie approach. You know, the whole just love someone with all your heart shtick. And unless you have the body of a greek god, or goddess, that's not really gunna work out for ya. Instead love has steps its supposed to reach one at a time. If any one person is on a different step, its going to be rough, and things won't go well. More than that, there's a certain level of closeness a man can't pass, if he gets too close, without establishing his intentions earlier on, he's going to be friendzoned, and he is likely never to return from the thick mists of that horrible quagmire of emotion and trauma. All in all if I've learned anything its don't love with all your heart, but don't discourage those that both can and do.
 There's two particular women that come to mind when I think love. And they're on opposite ends of the spectrum in the majority of cases. Ones a blonde, the other a brunette. One's emotional disposition is pretty damn close to a cat's, and the other almost spot on with a dog. Yet both of these women share one trait (other than their hatred of one another) and it's a certain disposition that I can't resist, one of loving with all their heart. The problem with this disposition however is that for the most part it means they're givers, and givers like takers, who in turn love givers, and I'm a giver, and that's "boring". I love givers, why the f**k wouldn't you choose someone who's going to put all they have into the relationship? why would you side with someone who only puts a "meh" amount into it? it makes no sense. Yet here we are.
 I stand before you a man who has had not a single girlfriend, yet a man who has felt more love for both of these women than they will ever find anywhere else. The reason I've failed, on both accounts, literally the same sentence. "I just don't feel a spark." there's nothing interesting about a man who just loves you. You can say you like puppies all you want, or you like simple things, but at the end of the day the human heart needs something to fight for, something to cling to, and if there's nothing there to cling to, then it just wont work... To which I say, "I can't change." The lessons stand before me, the horrible betrayals scream into my brain, and the utter failures and completely wasted years loom behind me, but simply put, being alone is the devil I know, and I'll be damned if anything changes who I am. I very well may never find a woman, I might die with the 6 kisses I have under my belt. In fact the odds of me never finding someone are greater than the odds I will. And people can tell you all day long "I just know you'll find someone" or "I feel it in my bones, that is just not your fate" these are just things they tell themselves so that they feel better about not caring about me, and that's fine, its not entirely about me anyways, but just once I want to find a girl here who can look me in the eye and say she loves me with all her heart and mean it, to say she'd never need anyone else. I know its an awful lot to ask, and that I'm nothing special, if anything the only thing special about me is how bad I am at this sort of thing, but d****t I can dream... I'm just still trying to figure out if that's a good thing...

© 2012 kenny


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Oh Kenny darling. You know I love you with all my heart right? I am in love with your passion. It makes me believe in human nature just a little bit more.

Posted 11 Years Ago



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Added on September 26, 2012
Last Updated on September 26, 2012

Author

kenny
kenny

About
I mostly write sad poems, tongue in cheek poems, and poems about rocks :) more..

Writing
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A Poem by kenny