Invisible

A Poem by Mackenzie Knitter

Just a little thing I always thought about while dealing with social anxiety.

What is it like to feel invisible?

Most people would instantly say it means to feel nothing,

To be nothing.

I however, disagree, for I am of the few that carefully

Pick and choose my words, as to avoid ridicule.

I seek acceptance, but not really even that,

I'm just seeking to not be the face they stare at.

My invisibility is not some grand power to be in awe of,

I have spent years trying to claw these shackles off,

And see the world, through unafraid eyes,

But that voice of doubt, that I try so hard to disguise

Drowns out all reason,

Leaving me weak,

Leaving me blind.

And so I walk, head down, hood up,

Eyes fixed so hard on the ground because

If I can't see them, they cant see me,

I won't see them, so they don't see me.

I will trade in my sanity,

Even if it means I must live on a leash.

See, invisibility isn't a lack of feeling or substance,

It's the taste of the finish line, but not being able to run the distance.

It's wanting someone so bad, but cutting your own tongue out,

Wanting so much to be heard, but just fading into the background.

When I was a kid, and everyone picked what superpower they wanted,

I always said,

Invisible.

© 2016 Mackenzie Knitter

Author's Note

Just some social anxiety problems.

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Featured Review

Ms. Twitch

Thank you for sharing this! I related so much with your piece especially in the lines

Pick and choose my words, as to avoid ridicule.
I seek acceptance, but not really even that,
I'm just seeking to not be the face they stare at.

I always feel the same when I'm out despite what some of my friends or those who meet me may think. Good vibes to you and your writing. Cheers!