MD 20/20 PT II [I will thank you for that]

This is about my ex-boyfriend and a crazy event that happened between us that I could not seem to let go of in high school and in my adult life.

Md20/20 PT II

[I Will Thank You For That]
02/01/05

 

Must you continue

To hold your breath

At the ocean’s consent?

My intentions sat at the oak table

With the utensils and clinging platters

My ambition to walk alone

Sealed my lips shut

And I forgot what it’s like to breathe

I went that far

 

The slavery I lived in

So many precious years

The annual ritual

I could suffocate in your pillowcase

While in peaceful slumber

Of nights I flew…

 

Good night, my sweet love

All of my blue friends

And my agnostic grave tillers

I LOVE YOU ALL…

 

You could christen my fate

Work in the hard hat zone

Building monuments of my destruction

I will thank you

I will thank you for that

You will create a reliance

To hold forever

 

Don’t pretend you don’t remember

The day I kneeled by the cross

Trying to turn myself inside out

To redeem myself of all sins

 

I tried to cleanse and wash them away

With bloodstains on my cheeks

And bruises on my sleek arms

Our world’s orbit went on hold

At our best interest

 

I love you

I still do

My organs churn at the mention

That shot through the echo

Was intended for you

You could hear my thought process

 

This crux formed outcomes

 

The poison still lingers in me

Your hands still caress me

 

You were in the parade

I smiled. I waved.

You’re the king on a float

We laughed as we wrapped up

All of the evidence in a blanket

They will never know this…

 

I will be the pseudo-girl

In disguises

Because I know

That I belong to you:

 

My mad dog prince of danger