Chapter  II: Returning Home

Chapter II: Returning Home

A Chapter by Xerclipse
"

Alan returns to his home. However, his pyschological unstability will be revealed

"

Chapter II

Returning Home

 

            The scene transitions to Alan walking through the woods. It is still night time as the shadows surround Alan. The owls fly silently through the trees and the wolves walk away from Alan. He walks to a house that is rundown. The house is made out of old wood, and the windows are cracked. When he enters in the house, the furniture appears to be worn out. Even though the likely chances of stability are small, he sits on the couch. Several springs are sticking out but he does mind. Alan takes out his blood stained hatchet and puts it on the coffee table. He takes out a piece of cloth, puts it in a container holding water, and wipes it on the blade. A black cat walks from a room and jumps up on the couch. The cat’s name is Limbo.

 

Limbo: Where have you been? Its past midnight and you haven’t told us.

 

            Alan ignores Limbo as he is still cleaning his hatchet. Limbo sits down looking at the bloody hatchet. The blood seeps on the table.

 

Limbo: I see…..you did another one of those! Well you still shouldn’t be doing that without telling us that you were about to do an exorcism. But speaking of exorcisms, the last time you didn’t tell us, we had to search for you and pull you out of the victim’s mind. You should have thanked Nebula for that but you never did. But can I tell you what I saw again? You were shaking, sweating, and screaming in pain. You were yelling at us that you were burning. So I had to jump into your mind and drive out that demon.

 

Alan: Please be quiet Limbo.

 

Limbo: Don’t worry Alan, I am not dictating what you should do. I am just spectator of all of this. Just don’t wander off like that.

 

Alan still cleans his hatchet. Limbo jumps on top of the couch and walks past Alan. He is at the opposite of the couch.

 

Limbo: So….who was the possessed victim? And who was the demon that…

 

            Alan grabs a bottle of alcohol. He drinks it while he pauses the cleaning.

 

Limbo: Oh boy Alan…..I hate it when you do that.

 

Alan: I am not a priest.

 

Limbo: But you still are an exorcist. Your work does please God. You would make a great priest for the church and for God.

 

Alan: (turns to Limbo) DON’T EVER SAY THAT AGAIN! I AM NOT A PART OF GOD!

 

Limbo: (pauses for a moment looking at Alan’s face) Then why do you wear that cross on your neck? Don’t tell me it is just for practical use. Sure demons don’t like it but I am sure it’s just more than a lucky charm.

 

Alan: You got it wrong. It is just for practical use.

 

Limbo: I don’t really understand this Alan, you really are a puzzle. You use the power of Christ as you don’t put your heart to him.

 

            Limbo jumps off the couch as walks away. Alan looks back at Limbo as some alcohol shines on his cheeks and mouth. Time passes by in six hours. It is day time and Alan is seen sleeping the couch with his hatchet on the table. His snoring can be heard in the living room. 

A young woman with blond hair enters out of the room. She does not smile as she walks. She wears a white dress with purple patterns on it. She walks up to Alan and puts her hand on Alan’s face. Limbo is seen behind the couch and walks up to the woman.

 

Limbo: Nebula…I see that you are up.

 

            Nebula closes her eyes and sits down. Her hand glows purple as Alan is still asleep


Nebula: He saved a little boy from a demon.

 

Limbo: What else happened?

 

Nebula:  The family was in happiness, and in joy. However he did not join in the celebration. He walked away…coldly.

 

Limbo: Yeah, what about why he left?

 

            Alan grabs Nebula’s hand swiftly. She has a minor reaction to his grabbing. He wakes up seeing Nebula’s face. Limbo is sitting on the arm rest.

 

Limbo: Wake up sunshine!

 

Alan gets up and takes his hatchet. He grabs the bottle of alcohol and drinks it again. He then opens the front door.

 

Limbo: ALAN! Where are you going now?

 

 Nebula walks by and holds Alan’s hand. Alan turns back at Nebula’s sad face but he pulls his hand away.

 

Alan: Don’t worry, I am just going to chop some wood.

 

            Alan exits the house and shuts the door violently. He can be seen in the woods from the window. Limbo looks at Alan chopping a tree down. His anger serves as his strength. Nebula sits back down on the couch as Limbo is still staring from the window. The tree loses its bark for some time. Alan begins to hear some voices in his head.

 

Voice 1: (in a man’s voice) Hey Alan, Hey Alan, what’s going on today?

 

Alan: Please, shut up!

 

Voice 2: (in a woman’s voice) Don’t worry, we are always here for you.

 

Alan: Yeah but you don’t exist.

 

Voice 1: Doesn’t mean that we can’t help you.

 

            Alan stops swinging his hatchet. He puts it on the ground.

 

Voice 2: Well I think it’s time for you to give yourself a break.

 

Voice 1: No, I actually am impressed with his work. Its cool how he cuts down those freaks, adapts to the bending mind, and slays the demon.

 

Voice 2: But he could have got himself hurt. Don’t talk to him like that. You are only encouraging him.

 

Voice 1: Encouraging him? He performs exorcisms for himself. I may as well be silent and allow him to do what he does.

 

Voice 2: Yeah you should. He is really going to get himself hurt.

 

Voice 1: Hurt? Come on getting hurt is an everyday thing. People get hurt whatever they do.

 

Voice 2: But he shouldn’t endure more pain. I mean look at him.

 

Alan accelerates his pace in chopping the tree.

 

Voice 1: Alan, don’t listen to her….she is just trying to make you feel happier. But you are already happy, aren’t you?

 

Voice 2: SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND LET ME TALK TO HIM!

 

Voice 1: DON’T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT.

 

Voice 2: DON’T BACKFIRE AT ME LIKE THAT!

 

Alan: (swings his hatchet on the tree) SHUT UP!

           

            The tree begins to fall down instantly from that one strike. Alan then smashes the trunk pervasively screaming. His sweat and his anger overlap his body. The voices slowly disappear. He walks back to the house with his hatchet. Limbo sees Alan walking back to the living room.

 

Limbo: Oh boy, you were at it again…talking to yourself.

 

Alan: The tree is chopped down. I will segment the wood later.

 

Nebula stares at him with sadness and disappointment. Alan ignores her gloomy face and sits at the table. He is sweaty and tired like an overworked horse. Limbo walks behind Alan and jumps up from the chair to the table. He licks his paws and looks at Alan. Nebula puts her hand through the door. Her hand glows purple. She turns to Alan and Limbo.

 

Nebula: There is someone here.

 

Alan: We don’t have time for anyone else. We got bigger issues.

 

Nebula: Someone desperate, isolated, lost, and afraid.

 

            Limbo jumps to the window and sees a thirteen year old girl walking alone. The fog develops as she walks on the path. She has a black pony tail and a sweatshirt on. The sweat shirt is striped with white and red. There is a heart seen at the middle of the chest. Her baggy and worn out pants can also be seen.

 

Limbo: Alan…this one here is heading straight for this house.

 

            Alan gets up instantly and pulls out his hatchet and his palm blades.

 

Limbo: HEY HEY…BE CAREFUL ALAN…. THIS ONE COMES UNARMED!

 

Alan: Nebula?

 

Nebula: She comes in peace.

 

Alan puts his weapons away and then closes his eyes looking down.

 

Alan: Just as long as it wasn’t an evil ghost or demon.

 

 

To Be Continued

 

 



© 2012 Xerclipse


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Reviews

Great chapter and continuation of the storyline. You've made Allen a very distinct character. I feel like those voices are a bit like parents to him. Why does his hatchet remain bloody even after he exists the bending mind?

Posted 7 Years Ago


Xerclipse

7 Years Ago

I was trying to show that what happens in the parallel worlds during the exorcism does not stay ther.. read more
Writer #00

7 Years Ago

I thought so, but I was just checking. I don't think there's anything wrong with his voices soundin.. read more
his house is already rundown...your sentence in line 4 doesnt make sense because it tells us that it is when he enters the house that the furniture begins to wear out. is the house attuned to his presence... alive? if not, use something like "on entering the house, he noticed the worn out furniture."
wander not wonder
and walks away line 36
sleeping on the couch
young woman comes out of the room. for better reading, describe the room. plus, how many rooms are there?
black pony tail sounds like she is with a horse. try " she has black hair pulled into a ponytail"
her baggy wornout pants sounds better
last sentence: isnt not wasnt.

i love the smooth entrance of Nebula.however, when going to a new idea or thought, start with a paragraph. it shows organization and makes the work easier to undestand.

viva

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Years Ago


Really good :)
100/100

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Years Ago


Very nice, how you developed the character's internal struggle. It seems as though he drives out the demons of others to get away from his own

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Years Ago


Xerclipse

7 Years Ago

yup that's pretty much his occupation. Not a happy guy. Keep on reading more if you wish. The fun st.. read more
Don’t worry Alan, I am not dictating what you should do. ----Alan;

Don’t worry, I am just going to chop some wood----worry;

Don’t worry, we are always here for you.---worry;

those were the only things I saw. I enjoyed this like usual :)

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Years Ago


A talking cat? Excellent! Always loved cats that talk, no idea why. Just seems really cool.


This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

lol I figured I needed some other sidekick that talks. And I thought why not a black cat that talks?.. read more
Wow! Another amazing chapter! I love Nebula and the cat and the trees! I absolutely love this book so far! I will continue reading! Great job :) This is so good!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


Schyala

8 Years Ago

I can't wait to read on! I will tomorrow after I finish this chapter.
Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

Lol i thought you finished this chapter. But take your time. This book is still in progress. I liter.. read more
Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

I made an intro and drawings for the characters. The drawings can be found at the profiles chapter.
I love the tlaking cat and the voices that are tormenting him. this going to be a fun scipt to read and i a,lookiing forward to it . Nicely done.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

well there will be more eventually. I decided to just add a talking black cat like how I had Krotus .. read more
Alan is definately grappling with a lot of issues. He seems to be reluctantly driven to do the things he does, and it is tormenting him. Limbo is a cool addition. I LOVE black cats.
Can't wait for part 3!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

lol black cats have become a symbol of mystery from the shows and movies that I saw. And yes, Alan i.. read more
Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

by the way I added something to the chapter. It is very short but you should probably read the last .. read more
Xerclipse

8 Years Ago

added an intro and made a chapter for character profiles. There are pictures of them that I drew.

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Added on July 29, 2012
Last Updated on August 28, 2012


Author

Xerclipse
Xerclipse

http://xerclipse.deviantart.com/gallery/, NY



About
Hey people of Writer's cafe, what's up? You may call me Xerclipse and its about a year since I had this. I am 18 years old and I am at Mass Art right now! I write books with a lot of action and vio.. more..

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