it's too early for poetry this late

nonfiction narrative poetry, humor

I sleep with the door open

sturdy screen shut and

locked against strays but

chill air is the reason

I sleep the winter

in this habitual way

learned camping years ago

with thin and starry

cold mountain air

sweetly arrayed

outside my tipi there

now residing in a town

often called the most

botanically diverse place

gracing life here

gardens so chosen

even February plants host

ghosts of many seeds

dropped pollen floats

from tiny stamen

coats things everywhere

motes of plant life

waft through screen

drift invisibly

over my sleeping face

on my eyes

in my nose

touch my mouth

like a lover’s caress

very well known

but all this plant matter

long in the wrong place

will tickle and tease

‘til the first sudden

wheeze and sneeze

ensure that I'll always

remember night's schemes

and my dreams

and all those many things

that otherwise take flight

at night

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

I think it’s a lovely dream, with amazing images of what you saw in your mind’s eye ….though a winter chili’s in the air, you dreamt of a perfect scene where nature awoke and plants and flowers begin to blooms and bees pollinate the flowers to set off a thin yellow powder, soft, but lands on everything from your car to your nose…and thus makes you sneeze…
A dream of wishes and hopes while the clear mountain air seeps into your sleep.
Beautiful write
Best, b.

[Betty Hermelee]

L.J. I love your critique of my book chapter, now called Cool Joe’s Redemption…..it’s in production now ( 350 pages) . I’d love to use your review of this chapter on the back cover if they will let me; I don’t have to use your name, maybe just the the Writer’s Cafe. What do you think? 😊
Best B.

[Betty Hermelee]

You can message me if you like!
B.

[LJ]

I did, don't worry...

[LJ]

This comment is meant in reply to your review of a recent poem - hope it goes to the right place, because I appreciate both the time you spent reading and the time to comment. Thank you!

[Betty Hermelee]

you're very welcome!!!!

[Caitlin]

I love this. "even February plants host ghosts of many seeds" is a hauntingly beautiful line.

[LJ]

Thanks, Caitlin, for your kind comment!

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Yes, this is a sucker punch of a write. Full of emotions and colorful, dreamy images that evoke nostalgia. I’m a huge fan of the way you write. I love writers that make you think, ones that take simple things and twist them to the image of your story and imagination. The mention of something like allergies makes this poem feel even realer. I try my hardest not to gush about them, but writing like this reminds me of my biggest inspirations, like Lorde, or Phoebe Bridgers. Thank you so much for sharing, this is going straight into my favorites so I can reread it whenever I need some inspiration. Oh, and the name of the poem is just awesome. It’s just all in all so great. (:

[LJ]

Aww, thank you very much - for reading and for this review. It's thoughtful and thorough. I'm particularly glad you like the name of the poem, and the general humor in the 'story' told. It's appreciated more than you may know. I'm very much a beginner with poetry, prose being my usual outlet, but reviews and comments like yours are very encouraging!

[LJ]

This review should be 'featured' - you know? Because it's 'real' ... also correct in a few ways. Thanks again.

[light and ashes]

I love this. I find it funny that you mention allergies at the end, lol..but this is a beautiful write.

[LJ]

Good, it was meant to amuse! Thanks for reading and your comment. (:

[light and ashes]

You are very welcome. I enjoy this very much.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

reminds me of camping in Boy Scouts...

a thrill that also brought a chill
sounds of the night
inducing slight fright.
yes, allergies cause a tickle
but the victim is not laughing...
j.

[LJ]

Haha - I understand about camping, and I like your poetic reply here. Thanks, Jacob, for reading and commenting. It's appreciated very much. (: