Half Empty

drinking tea, what can I say...

The leaves in my teapot

are turning brown

and my mood

has sunk to autumn ground,

gathering with the others

who couldn’t hang on

a little longer

The sediment in my cup

needs emptying, but I’ve grown lazy

with the winter doldrums,

just hanging out at the bottom.

Reviews

[Pax Analog]

I see from comments that others are either taking your poem as a downer or a lovely melancholy.

I dunno, I think the mood can be quasi-hibernativive, restoring from sediment doldrums a natural simplicity.

Even "Half Empty" with its pessimistic implication, takes on a different meaning Zen-wise.

Hanging out at the bottom's where the bass line pulses.

[Michael Bauer]

nice lyrical little piece, falling down the page kind of like tea leaves sinking. the grounding of the ground with brown is a sweet little surprise. i wonder if a fuller stop would show well at 'others', and then a coordination, like,

... others,
they couldn't hang on
longer.

... i do see that you don't want the formal punctuation, but the line breaks work as punctuation anyway and this one has a kind of 1930's easy feeling to it and maybe could be formed out in the more obvious way, without it seeming contrived.

nice read.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

ah, the gypsies read the future from the tea leaves left in the cup so basically, if you use tea bags, you have no future, lol I did not think it was all that sad, just a little melancholy

[C. M. Miller]

Well, this poem basically started at the bottom and then dug a hole! It's always darkest before the blah, blah, blah . . . now if I were a reader of tea leaves, and I am not saying that I am, but for the sake of this review, let us assume that I am, I would venture to say, hazard a guess, posit an opinion . . . oh what da'hell, I am just stalling because this poem is just so depressing I can't rub two thoughts together.

So, good job. Now I am depressed . . . I hope you are "happy" now! :-)

[SJ.]

beautifully written.
captured my soul:D

[Gandré]

this was beautiful.
totally enjoyed it.
loved its melancholy.

[Celtic Cat]

As a tea-tottler, and one-time seasonal depressive (it spans all seasons now! lol) I must say I LOVE this piece. It's a great tumbling down the rabbit hole kind of feel for me.... it's lovely. Faving this gem for sure. Peace~~