The Red Pitchfork

The Red Pitchfork

A Story by T. Val
"

A college assignemnt. I needed to pick my best or worst experience with one of the 5 senses. I was the only person to recieve an A on this, and it's a piece I am extremely proud of.

"

This miserable fall day could have never prepared my eyes for the beauty that was to come only hours later. For once, the Manhattan air was not dominated by taxi horns, and the sound of corporate neck ties stepping their way through the city streets and sidewalks, but instead, by the sound of rain droplets plunging from the sky and on to the pavement. However, nothing really seemed out of the ordinary. I made my 19 block walk from Penn Station to Roseland Ballroom, and there she was waiting for me. Only literally in my dreams. Living, breathing, walking, talking beauty, the most vivid of its kind, standing not ten feet away from me. She is clearly out of my league. Infact, I can't imagine that she is in anyones league.

 

I could not take my eyes off of her. Her lips. Jesus Christ those lips that she had. Full lips that fit her face quite nicely that were painted in a crimson and shined to perfection which easily stood out on her smooth, powdery skin. A silver hoop hugged the right side of her bottom lip that I caught her tongue playing with on several glances that I took the liberty of taking. A small and pointy nose sat in the center of her face with a tiny, fake diamond stud going through her left nostril. She had the bluest eyes that would camouflage in a clear July sky. Wrapped around her eyes was a thick black layer of eye shadow and mascara which dripped down her cheeks from the tearing sky. And it was at this point that I realized, Atreyu was wrong. There IS beauty in bleeding mascara. She chose not to take advantage of the hood that was attached to her grey hoodie, and let her silky and straight jet black hair mosh through the wind. Her hair seemed to flail through the air and into her face in slow motion, which she would constantly clear away from her eyes with her small, pale, black nail polish painted fingers.

 

This specimen could not have been more than 5 feet, 3 inches tall. She had small breasts that were perfectly proportionate to her body. She was short and skinny, which made her tall, black and white boots that probably contained enough lace to lasso the homeless guy across the street that was screaming what seemed like a mix between Gibberish and Japanese, or some other language that I will never learn...or maybe it was perfect English but I just chose not to pay attention, stand out as one of her many visible bold features. She stood talking to her two girlfriends for the next hour until the venue had opened, and I am confident that if I was asked to give a detailed description of either of them to police, it would extend to them both being female, and end right then and there.

 

It was finally time to walk into the venue. I had my friends ticket that I was waiting for, and lucky for me, that son of a b***h was late, and I was forced to let people that were behind me go inside before I could. For whatever reason, I chose to never bring this chick up to him even though it had consumed me for the entire night. I watched as the only thing that has ever literally taken my breath away turned her back on me and walk into the distance. It wasn't until seconds before the last time I would ever lay my eyes on her that I noticed the red pitchfork tattoo on the back of her right leg. Just another unique feature that stood out to me in case our paths were meant to cross again that night, or any night. Instead of enjoying the show, I spent a majority of it with my eyes wandering across this orgy of thousands, looking for the girl with the pierced face and black hair. However, she was nowhere to be seen. While it was a disappointment, her figure is forever branded in my mind until the day that our four blue eyes become tangled from a close distance, or until I am the only person to notice an illuminating red pitchfork on the back of someones right leg.

 

T. Val

© 2013 T. Val


Author's Note

T. Val
Please rate, and give any feedback. I hope this piece was enjoyed by all of you.

My Review

Would you like to review this Story?
Login | Register




Reviews

Very descriptive. A feeling of looking at this girl through my own eyes. Good writing.

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

Thanks so much!
Wonderful work! The description in this was powerful and very well placed. For such a short story you did an amazing job in painting the setting and the atmosphere. :D Awesome job!

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

Very appreciated. Glad you enjoyed this :)
Wow very well done! You're amazing! The detail you put into it, I could clearly see what you were describing. It doesn't surprise me that you got an A! I just wish there was more haha :'D

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

Thank you so much for that. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Mutt

11 Years Ago

Anytime! C:
What an excellent piece! I felt like I was there standing next to you looking at her as well, haha. Awesome detail with great imagery. If its one thing I love is metal chicks. I go to alot of gigs out here in L.A. and let me tell there are so many beautiful met al that go to these gigs it's insane! I've gotten to know alot of them over the years. Now after reading this I'm really looking forward to seeing MESHUGGAH in March, haha. MR. CREEPER gives you an A+++ with 2 horns up. I'm shelving this one.

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

I appreciate it. Glad you enjoyed this.
Really powerful and beautiful imagery. It reads very well and your word flow is amazing. Great story, thank you so much for penning

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

Thanks! I'm glad that you enjoyed it.
Silhouette

11 Years Ago

Anytime :)
first of all.. I really like this.. you used a lot of good discriptive phrases.. and for an exercise it is very good.. but I am a simple woman.. and I wonder how it would sound if it were told a bit more simply.. have you read it aloud..? I love the red pitchfork..

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

Thanks so much. I tried putting great detail in this because I like to paint a picture for the reade.. read more
Good thing you got an A, because you deserve it! Your descriptive words are very powerful and beautiful. You turned what seems like an ordinary experience into something much more special and unique!

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

This is very appreciated!
Beautiful imagery. I can see how you recieved an 'A' for it. I can practically see her!!! And I love the way you give the guy hope at the end. He saw her tattoo, something she'll always have, something he will always be looking for. Great work! :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


T. Val

11 Years Ago

Thank you!

6
next Next Page
last Last Page
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1777 Views
58 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on February 18, 2013
Last Updated on February 24, 2013
Tags: New York, Manhattan, sad, wonder, mystery, beauty, beautiful

Author

T. Val
T. Val

Lawngylnd, NY



About
I've been writing on and off since high school for personal pleasure. I love music and quotes with a strong meaning or a deep/sad meaning behind it. 27 year old male from Long Island New York. I .. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


How to lead How to lead

A Poem by Odayin