Peeking At Peaks

Peeking At Peaks

A Poem by Laurierose
"

On that avalanche

"

Had a feeling

A tickle

An itch

Premonition

A peek into our future;

A silly premonition

 

I want to hold your hand

So when we’re climbing this mountain

My footing is stable

My vitals are clear

My grip is steady…

Your hold I fear

 

Reflect to me your heart

And bare me your sole.                             

When my shoes run tired

And feet too cold.

 

I’m scared to look up now

At the hand that held true

Because I’ve already glimpsed

And that hand may not be you…

© 2018 Laurierose


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Featured Review

I love your very original & artful poem which conveys a seeming contradiction in message. Perfect way to pique your audience’s interest & curiosity – a dynamic & interactive read. What does this mean? When did I feel this way? If it isn’t who I thought, then who is it? For me, your message has spiritual overtones. So many times we attribute some aspects of life to the humans attached to a situation, when in fact, much later we figure out there was a little divine intervention at a perfect time! *smile* Fondly, Margie

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Year Ago

I'm always delighted to read everyone's perspective on poetry. Poetry itself is laced with intellect.. read more



Reviews

dear Laurierose... reminds me of touching His Robe...
or wearing His Sandals... in a poetic sense. However,
in my life, I have been fortunate to climb mountains
with a "hand to hold" and give me a good footing.
I do believe in divine guidance and looking up...
truly love your poem. fondly, Pat


Posted 1 Week Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Week Ago

Ah, I love how you perceived this in the religious light. If you look at it from that lens, then one.. read more
This poem has so many layers. It is so contradictory.
"I want to hold your hand/
So my footing is stable. . .Your hold I fear"
I think it is interesting how someone requests a hand hold to help with their footing, as if they didn't need the hand hold at all. And then, they take it back, and say they fear the hand hold.

There are a lot of hints that the person in this relationship has the intuition that the relationship is wrong and is going to fail, but is trying to ignore it.

Props to the "sole" pun... perfection.

Loved the uncertainty and complexity of this piece. That's how real relationships are.



Posted 1 Week Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Week Ago

Yes, relationships can be very complex. Even more so with emotions. Glad you noticed the pun! Gotta .. read more
Waiting, wishing and hoping. Make final place perfect. I liked the thoughts and the need of the poem. A honest ending. Sometimes, we don't get what we want. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

4 Months Ago

I learned this lesson in love and life. It doesn't always turn out in the end, but we can't help but.. read more
Coyote Poetry

4 Months Ago

Was my pleasure and you are welcome.
It's a very open metaphor, and the reader is free to read into it. It might be taken in a spiritual or romantic way.
Just a minor question, in "And bare me your sole," is sole a typo or a pun? It distracted me a little from the poem.

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

7 Months Ago

It was intended. It’s almost the same as someone saying “lend me your hand.” This person is li.. read more
A wonderful piece of poetry. The last stanza was amazing. I really appreciate that. Great work!!!

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

7 Months Ago

I appreciate the sincere review. Thanks!
I really like how your poem moves along describing your climb with your lover /guide. There is a premonition that all may not be well, you trust your safety in him, and then the horrible moment of realisation at the end. You have executed this well and i like your punchy style. Just a thought - would 'a premonition' in the first verse work better, but a minor suggestion. I really liked it!
Cheers,
Alan

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

7 Months Ago

Thank you so much! I definitely wanted to stay as true to the climax/peak as possible. It seems as t.. read more
Remarkable. I can't say which line/stanza is my favorite. Each one was written so well. I LOVED the ending, and the second to last stanza stands out to me. Well-written!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Year Ago

I appreciate such kind feedback, my friend. So touching!
I love your very original & artful poem which conveys a seeming contradiction in message. Perfect way to pique your audience’s interest & curiosity – a dynamic & interactive read. What does this mean? When did I feel this way? If it isn’t who I thought, then who is it? For me, your message has spiritual overtones. So many times we attribute some aspects of life to the humans attached to a situation, when in fact, much later we figure out there was a little divine intervention at a perfect time! *smile* Fondly, Margie

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Year Ago

I'm always delighted to read everyone's perspective on poetry. Poetry itself is laced with intellect.. read more
Life is so often a copy of your last stanza...

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Year Ago

Life does have a tendency to do that. Thanks for noting that. Appreciate it greatly.
Chris

1 Year Ago

I do listen to your voice...you've thoughts to share.
Laurierose

1 Year Ago

Of course, I greatly appreciate that and reading your perspectives.
Oh, that was a right kick in the bottom! Expressed with such a wonderful flair and style. That really hide a dark depth inside it all.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Laurierose

1 Year Ago

Lol! Thanks for the kind review, Dee!

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11 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on June 29, 2018
Last Updated on June 29, 2018

Author

Laurierose
Laurierose

Durham, NC



About
Poet at heart. Romantic by nature. Nature the style. Styled by experiences. Experience this world that is my mind... If interested, check out my book in stores: https://www.amazon.com/Wonderful-.. more..

Writing
Emerge Emerge

A Poem by Laurierose



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