Whispers

Whispers

A Poem by Levioshock
"

Just a poem I got from a little inspiration

"

Find me a word

Heed my call

Songs from a bird

Waiting on the wall

 

Can you hear me?

Can you not?

Please my angel

Don’t fear the dark

 

Nay the bee

Calm the trees

The Willow’s whisper

Your sweet kiss

 

Come to me

My dark eyed maiden

Play me you

Sweetened cadence

 

Take my hand

And follow me

While we rest

In the sea

© 2010 Levioshock


Author's Note

Levioshock
I want you honest opinions

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

I thought it was okay. Thanks for sharing. :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


I liked how you had a slant rhyme going, and then you completely ruined it in the second and third stanzas. It would be way better with the rhyme pattern. It was still a lovely poem. Keep writing.

Posted 14 Years Ago


My honest opinion is that this is better than the average teenage sap-rhyme. However, that certainly doesn't mean its a masterpiece. Your rhyme is all over the place and there is no actual meter, which makes rhyming impossible. If you don't know anything about meter, please look it up on wikipedia, because rhyming poetry needs it to thrive. Sweet sentiments, though, and I'm sure whoever inspired it should like it.

Posted 14 Years Ago


good job I enjoyed reading it

Posted 14 Years Ago


nice job

Posted 14 Years Ago


this was good. i really liked it a lot!

Posted 14 Years Ago


I like the imagrery and the way it puts you right where you want the reader I love it keep on going. :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


Pretty cool. I like the imagery

Posted 14 Years Ago


wonderful, good job!

Posted 14 Years Ago


amazing good job :)

Posted 14 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1458 Views
47 Reviews
Rating
Added on April 12, 2010
Last Updated on April 13, 2010
Tags: willow whispers ocean love tree

Author

Levioshock
Levioshock

Copley, OH



About
My writing is dark. I don't know why, it's just what comes out of me. I love writing and I love reviewing writing so give me all you can. If you want to get to know me, hit me up on facebook :) more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Cant Sleep... Cant Sleep...

A Story by Manda


first love first love

A Poem by LynLee


Angela Angela

A Poem by Coyote Poetry


Death Death

A Poem by HorrorMaster