A Bleak Sight of Hope

A Bleak Sight of Hope

A Poem by Paper Forks


Beneath the facade one wears a deceit,

enduring feelings, gratefully received.

Deluded past of one’s failed devotion

was grandly spiced with hidden affection.


Decreed to loathe but refused to do it.

Forbidden to yearn yet firmly seized it.

Existence’s journey on hindered path

was a bleak sight of hope ensconced with wrath.


While fleeing the scene of unwanted rain,

one might look back just to delve in the pain.

Divert one’s zeal from tragic misfortune,

pick up what’s left of one's dying passion.


Send one’s misery to concluding contention.

End one’s torment with satisfying conclusion.

© 2015 Paper Forks


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Featured Review

This poem feels a little scattered and confused. I think I can see what you're going for, but the message is hiding under too many flowery words without any meaning behind them. It feels like the poem was written by a thesaurus and not a human with emotions. Plus, there are muddled phrases like the opening one-- "beneath the facade one wears a deceit" -- which doesn't really mean anything. A facade is ALREADY a deceit. So to wear deceit underneath a facade is meaningless.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Justin Xavier Smith

9 Years Ago

I wasn't trying to attack you. I'm just saying, this poem is clearly more in your head and personal .. read more
Paper Forks

9 Years Ago

thank you for the honesty. yeah, i do tend to muddle up my poems most of the time. i tend to rewrite.. read more
Justin Xavier Smith

9 Years Ago

I understand completely. Keep writing!!



Reviews

A realistic view in the words. The strong description led to the powerful ending.
"Send one’s misery to concluding contention.
End one’s torment with satisfying conclusion."
The above lines left me with sadness. Are we left with misery and torment only? Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 9 Years Ago


Lovely poem with what seems like a lot of emotion carefully hidden within each line. I really like the line:
"While fleeing the scene of unwanted rain,

one might look back just to delve in the pain."


Posted 9 Years Ago


This poem feels a little scattered and confused. I think I can see what you're going for, but the message is hiding under too many flowery words without any meaning behind them. It feels like the poem was written by a thesaurus and not a human with emotions. Plus, there are muddled phrases like the opening one-- "beneath the facade one wears a deceit" -- which doesn't really mean anything. A facade is ALREADY a deceit. So to wear deceit underneath a facade is meaningless.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Justin Xavier Smith

9 Years Ago

I wasn't trying to attack you. I'm just saying, this poem is clearly more in your head and personal .. read more
Paper Forks

9 Years Ago

thank you for the honesty. yeah, i do tend to muddle up my poems most of the time. i tend to rewrite.. read more
Justin Xavier Smith

9 Years Ago

I understand completely. Keep writing!!
Very deep message behind this...... very enjoyable to read. Good work on this piece!

Posted 9 Years Ago


Some would say that any hope - is good hope. In the context of a relationship though both have to want to see the hope for anything to happen - or perhaps one's faith is enough to convince the other.
Its better to have loved and lost...etc
I liked the deep understanding in this and the compassionate undercurrent.
Thank you PF, for the RR.
:)


Posted 9 Years Ago



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Added on February 25, 2015
Last Updated on February 25, 2015

Author

Paper Forks
Paper Forks

Nigeria



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If I have to describe myself in three words it would be narcissistic, conceited, egoistic, indecisive. Befriend me with caution: I bite. Note: I will be ruthless in my reviews. I will not sugarc.. more..

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