Chapter Two

Chapter Two

A Chapter by Meradee
"

All of Georgie's escape attempts fail...miserably.

"

   In the middle of the Amazon...

   As was the custom, when her kidnappers wished to get her up, her face was slapped rather harshly. Georgie was awake instantly, although it was a miracle that she managed to sleep at all. But instead of the usual stale bread and tepid water, she was jerked out of bed and led groggily from her cell. Blue bandanna held her arm securely and pushed her slightly ahead of him. She began to worry about what was going to happen now. She'd never been a hostage before and therefore had no idea what to expect. But then, of course, how many people are held hostage more then once? The odds of it happening at all are very slim, even in her job.

   Blue Bandanna led her to a room with a single light hanging from the ceiling. In the middle of the room was a large claw footed tub with steaming hot water in it. A towel sat on a chair over top of some clean clothes. Georgie gave a cry of delight for she had been in her vile prison for at least a week if the sun was to be trusted. Her hair was greasy and her skin was oily. The wash cloth and soap that were sitting on the rim of the tub seemed to be a gift from God. Blue bandanna let her arm go and then slammed the door behind him.

   Georgie wasted no time undressing and climbing into the hot water. It was heaven as she washed her nasty hair and ran the washcloth over her body and face. She finished washing quickly, not sure how soon Blue Bandanna would come back. She surely didn't want him to come in while she was naked. Once she stepped out of the tub she grabbed the clean white towel and breathed in the wonderful smell of laundry detergent. After drying off she pulled on the clothes they had provided for her, she was extra grateful when she saw the clean underclothes. It was the toothbrush and toothpaste underneath it all that caused the tears to come. It was then that she noticed the little bucket of water in the corner. She tested it with her fingers and the almost began to cry again when it was clean and cold.

   After she had brushed her teeth she sat on the chair that had held the towel and her clothes. She sat there for several minutes before the door opened. Although it wasn't Blue Bandanna that came through the door. No, it was a person that she did not expect to see.

* * * * *

   Manaus Airport

   Gray walked off the plane, grateful that he no longer had to keep his six foot six inch frame folded up in the tiny seats. The flight from Miami had been absolute torture and he was glad that there wasn't going to be occasion for him to get on a plane for a while. He predicted that it would take at least two months before they were ready to leave the country.

   It was going to take time getting the cherie from where ever she was and then it would take time to get her far enough away without drawing attention to her. According to the dossier that ALPHA's researchers had provided, that the alleged leader of the radicals in Manaus had his fingers in just about every pie. He also had contacts and people that would be watching if she somehow escaped.

   Arturo Mendez conducted business privately and in back rooms where no one would hear or find any evidence of his exploits. Everything that ALPHA had on him was purely circumstantial, and he was only the alleged leader of the radicals. Which could be dangerous if they had their sites set on the wrong man. Ultimately the entire assignment was dangerous in every sense of the word.

   Once Gray was away from the terminal he called Bushman for a report. "Bushman." He answered.

   "Sir," Gray said, "Have you heard from the undercover agent yet?"

   There was a pregnant silence on the other side of the line, it was a silence that worried Gray. It took a lot to silence Bushman, even if the situation was bad. "We've heard from him but we weren't able to get any information out of him. He couldn't even give us the latitude and longitude he only could tell us he was alright. There's trouble, and we don't know how severe it is. Try to pick up information subtly while you're there. Be extremely subtle, you don't want to draw Mendez's attention."

   After speaking with Bushman for a few moments longer Gray finally hung up to speak to his team of four."Any news?" Marcus Green, a small balding man with incredible reflexes asked, his bushy eyebrows pulling together as he read the expression on Gray's face.

   "Yeah, the undercover agent couldn't speak for very long. I don't like it. He should have at least been able to give us the latitude and longitude, but he was even unable to do that." Gray ran his hand through his dark brown hair in a sign of aggravation.

   "Could he have changed loyalty?" Brent Leary, six feet tall, blond, with a clean cut look that only came from growing up with lots of money.

   "I don't know." Gray replied thinly. He was just about ready to consider everything.

   "What were Bushman's instructions?" Regina Hansmen asked cocking her head to the side in a gesture that showed she was giving you her full attention. She had grown up on the wrong side of the tracks and had dealt with a lot more then any of them could imagine. Her brother had been killed in a drive-by shooting when she was seventeen, all because he was a member of the wrong gang.

   "Try to find information discreetly. He put emphasis on discreet." Gray said and then picked up his carry-on. The duffle bag had been all he'd brought with him. It had all the things he would need, excluding a gun. There was a special room in the airport that ALPHA opperatives could go to aquire a weapon without having to go through customs. That would be their next stop.

* * * * *

   In the middle of the Amazon...

   Georgie groaned in pain when she woke up three days after she'd been given a chance to bathe. Shortly afterward she had made her first escape attempt and had been caught. The punishment was horrible. She could feel the bruises on every inch of her body, her fat lip felt funny, and she could still barely open her left eye.

   She'd managed to run to the edge of the miniscule clearing surrounding the tiny builing in which she was held before they had caught her. The defeat she had felt had been greater then anything she'd ever experienced before in her life. But she knew she couldn't give up, she just couldn't. Just as soon as she could move she would try again. Georgie wasn't going to give up.

* * * * *

   Paradise Hotel

   Manaus, Brazil

   Gray surveyed the boarded up building that now stood empty. Just a week and a half ago the hotel had been full of guests, all excited for their vacations. Of course that was before the shooting that had killed fifty-seven people and left ninety wounded. And one couldn't forget the missing UN officer that had been taken so roughly.

   "Do you think she's alive?" Regina asked as she inspected the building closely, looking for what, Gray had no clue.

   "Yes. They wouldn't have gone through so much trouble to kidnap her just to kill her." Gray replied with quiet confidence. The men that had taken the lovely French woman wanted her alive, whether it was just for their entertainment or if they were just following orders.

   "Do you think they'll harm her?" Regina asked. She was asking a lot of opinion questions. Normally during an investigation like this you took into account all of the facts and then came up with questions from there. These seemed just like random questions a female would ask about another female. And that's just what they were.

   "I don't believe they will have any qualms with hurting her. A few broken bones will still keep her valuable. She's not going into the slave trade or a harem so there's no reason to keep her in pristine condition. Unless they were ordered to." Then something clicked in Gray's head. "Bushman said that Chevalier was good at dodging her security, right?"

   Regina replied eagerly, having worked with Gray on several other occasions she knew when he was on to something. "Yes."

   "If the security didn't know where she was, and she didn't use her real name on the flight over here, then she must have told someone where she was. Someone she knew, and trusted." Gray couldn't believe that they had looked over that little detail. It was so important, yet they had just ignored it. "Call Bushman and have him get a name of all the people she was close to. UN workers, secretaries, friends, even family. Then we'll have Marcus check them all out and we'll see if we can find a way to connect them to the kidnappings."

 



© 2009 Meradee


Author's Note

Meradee
Once again, please rip this apart. I want to know what you really think about it. Does it need anything, do I need to take anything out? Just tell me so I can know! :)

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This is well written, but based on the tone you seem to be drawing towards I need to feel more of what the character in the first few paragraphs is feeling. For example, you explain "her face was slapped harshly" by her captors. This gives me a perfectly clear visual, but why not go a step further to invole the reader? What did the slap feel like to her? Would it have felt different, or worse, because she was in a deep slumber, suddenly smacked out of that state of being? What could the slap be compared to? Did it burn afterwards like a sting from some venomous insect? As the reader, I'm letting you drive this thing, but merely showing me what is happening doesn't stick me in the middle of the scene.

Don't go crazy making all kinds of these changes, because the meat of what this is supposed to be about is clearly already there. I think all you need to do to really draw me in, is pump a little more feeling into certain parts, especially at the begining. The greasy hair, the oil coated skin, these are all great. Just go a bit further and I for one would be satisfied.

Feel free to take this advice or throw it in the dumpster, I mean what the f**k do I know, right? Good luck!

Posted 14 Years Ago



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Added on February 17, 2009


Author

Meradee
Meradee

New York, NY



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Okay guys, after nearly two years of being dormant, I've decided to completely re-vamp my account here. I'm going to try and be as active as possible and post things as much as I can. I will tell .. more..

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