Perspective

I have struggled, haphazardly, through depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and suicidal thoughts. Those who know this about me commend me for my strength and my perseverance. I never saw myself this way. Rather, I give credit to those around me- for support, advice, and their presence.

 

It's selfish.

 

It's the easy way out.

 

I think back to my ex-boyfriend who hung himself, and refuse to see him this way. The media portrays suicide as weak. Those who like me who made it through are praised as strong. Our stories are told as victories. The problem with this is that we put the memories of those who did kill themselves at risk. How do we view them? Weak? That negates their experience and their pain.

 

It is the same thing as comparing our experiences to others. Would you tell someone who is dealing with the loss of a pet: "Well it could be worse. It could have been a person." ? I hope not. Their pain is REAL. It as real as the person dealing with the loss of a friend. Our feelings are subjective and no one should tell us how much we are supposed to feel them.

 

When we cast suicide as being weak or the easy way out, we ignore the magnitude of their pain. What sends some people over the edge is the not the same as others but that does not make them weak. Pain is subjective and we can't judge because we won't ever know, because we are not the ones feeling it.

Author's Note

I do not believe suicide is an acceptable response to pain. I only want to change how we perceive loved ones who are gone.

Reviews

[Kelly Scheppers]

I've always felt it takes a great amount of strength to want to physically end your life. I've never understood why it is looked upon as a weakness, or a way out. Pain can be incapacitating, and there's only so much a person can take - of that I believe.

May you continue toward better days. And welcome to the WC!

[LimitlessCoffee]

Thank you! I see your point, though, I think there is a danger in saying there is strength in suicide as it romanticizes suicide. I agree with you about pain being incapacitating.