A Poem by Lisa Burns

Every passion pales
At the touch of your lips.
Your eyes envelope my soul
And I see.
As the wind feels the trees,
You feel me.
You know me – edging
Into every dark place and
Reveling in every bit of light.
Every turning leaf, every
Broken branch brings you closer.
And suddenly –
without ever leaving the ground
I can fly.

© 2009 Lisa Burns

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Very interesting, the ambiguity creates a sense of intimacy. I like the fact that you use nature, and the turning of time, like in the lines: 'Every passion pales,' 'every turning leaf,' 'As the wind feels the trees,' and 'Broken branch brings you closer. And suddenly � without ever leaving the ground I can fly.' This gave me a sense of change, like the seasons. The way you incorporate the season change, nature in the sense of a tree, its branches, and the flying leaf which is implied, you make me feel as though to be the flying leaf is something unique and all to your own. A feeling that is personal, maybe thus the reason for the title. A feeling of Ecstasy one may feel of feeling a bond or connection with something, or someone else. I liked this poem, however I think that you should try to practice the use of action rather than description, a good tool in writing poetry to make few words explode in the reader's mind into a larger meaning. This is something very hard to accomplish, I have a hard time myself trying to use action words over descriptive words. Overall I liked this poem and thought that it did bring a sense of personal ecstasy which someone may feel a bond for. Thank you for writing it, and keep writing.

Posted 11 Years Ago

Simple and sensual. Great job!

Posted 11 Years Ago

Softly sensual, yet I can feel the fire beneath the words.

Very well done
Roses at your feet

Posted 11 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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3 Reviews
Added on September 27, 2009

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