Mind vs. Heart

Wandering down the hallways of my Mind

They are not lit tonight

No, I have to grope my way around this time

My heart feels but has no sight

Searching, searching through this maze

It seeks for that one door

I press along the walls and feel them decay

Reason crumbles to the floor

Standing before the final door at last

Darker, darkness do I feel

My heart is warned it should never pass

It is blocked with a will of steel

Releasing through a sigh all my heart contains

Through tears I bare my soul

Locked away in my Mind you’ve had to wait

But it has lost control

 

Reviews

[the in between]

Very great writing here :) the beginning was powerful but i kind of don't understand what you mean by "releasing through a sigh all my heart contains through tears I bear my soul locked away in my Mind you've had to wait but it has lost control." You mind has been taken over by blind emotion and not reason? what was locked away? Loved this :) made me think and I relate to it too a bit

[Deviant Works]

Sigh... "My heart feels but has no sight". After being so hurt, discarded as if you meant nothing, you do feel like you are walking through a maze basked in darkness, everything decaying around you, nothing matters anymore, all you want is a piece of your true self back. You try to hold on but you sit alone, no one can really understand your pain so you sink further and further. However, I believe that sometime you have to hit rock bottom in order to get back up again. Lovely read.

[The Raven King]

Your line breaks are very good as well as the pacing and flow of the poem. This poem sounds and feels tight and solid. Good job!

[Marie Harrison]

I like this poem. It seems to be a journey through healing that we tend to go through when we aren't quite ready to let go. Clever poem to me.

[Kena]

Great choice of words, and once again, well written! :)

[Wolfwind Words]

I really like the theme and overall image this piece has woven. I do think that the flow could be made smoother by evening out the line length. In a piece like this, the saying, "Less is More" should be kept in mind.

Wolfie

[QC]

Speechless.

Fav. part:

' Wandering down the hallways of my Mind
They are not lit tonight
No, I have to grope my way around this time '

[Dupree]

You're good at presenting emotions and giving them the imagery they diserve. You're flow is great. I'm highly impressed with your talents

Nice flow.
Awesome imagery.
Absolutely beautiful!
I'm speechless. ;P

[Kate Hunter]

you have a lot of potential.
nice flow to the poems, good emotion and imagination.
Good Job.
Keep writing!