Capsule

The past makes me happy.

The one thing I do endlessly is live in the past

 I've always been attracted without a doubt to anything vintage

I am nostalgic of eras I want to know, but their the affection of my heart

And when it comes to my past, I know that nobody can take it away from me

They can't change it, they can't steal it like a thief  in the Indigo night

Because my real happy times were back in this capsule of memories

I keep digging it up because Till dawn hoping to embark my loss

I'm not afraid to say my past defines me

I'm looking forward with it constantly on my mind

I've balanced out the highs from the lows

 I'm no longer bitter but I got this twisted N special kind of sadness

 I know now..... I'm drawn to the darker side of things

 But sweet as I can be my life is like root beer, I'm enjoying the fizzle of soda

The bubbles on my lips excite me like a tomorrow does

And I know in time i'll get the real thing soon

I'll get real drunk, but I won't spill my secrets once I see the stars

Stars that remind me of him, and the girl I used to be

I am not quite sure how drunk i'll get off happiness

If I get it that is, but I am hoping I get my happy times back.... 

So i'll keep playing this record in my head

I'll still cry if I want to like its my birthday

I'll still smile when I think about sweet moments 

And ill never really let go because if my past was my child

Who was dangling off the edge of a building 

I'd hold on,and save my past in my arms 

Until somebody is willing to understand this feeling

And my thoughts will voluminously be wide as the ocean...

So I will put on my Mask, and promise you I'm not delusional 

I promise I am not crazy, but once the mask comes off 

I can't keep any promises because who knows if i'll keep them.....

Author's Note

It's okay to hold on.....