As Time Slips Away

I'm not sure how to describe this really I cried writing it I hope it makes some people realize that you shouldn't waste you time

As the days go by my passion wanes
In bones I feel the aches and pains
What once was can never be again
I'll never be what I was back then
I was a fool young and dumb
Now I'm old my body numb
As the days grow shorter and my life with it
I look back on my days of never saying quit
Now my days spent in regret
There's something I won't forget
Though now my memory fades
I still remember my young days
The days of my mom tucking me in
Dad telling me "Son you're too thin"
My brother constantly wanting to fight
Teaching my sister there is nothing to fright
As I moved on I found new friends
Some left others stayed till the end
My wife's last breath of "I love you"
My children leaving, to say "I do"
The things I do and that I've done
Will never complete me or make me one
Though I hold back the tears and the crying
I still have to tell myself I'm lying
I once thought games and money were what I sought
But the love of my family or friends was never bought
So now as I sit here all alone
I still feel the aches in my bones
Now as I fade I have words for you
My life is gone nothing I can do
So listen to an old mans wish and do as I say
Don't stay inside , don't waste this day
Go find those friends and that other you need
Never follow the path of evil and greed.

Author's Note

Tell me your honest opinion don't hold back.

Reviews

[Sami Khalil]

"Though I hold back the tears and the crying
I still have to tell myself I'm lying
I once thought games and money were what I sought
But the love of my family or friends was never bought
So now as I sit here all alone
I still feel the aches in my bones"

A splendid read and write. I like those lines the best...:)..................

[DarkArtz 0703]

"Though I hold back the tears and the crying
I still have to tell myself I'm lying"
oh my lord I like it... sad but I feel the vibe your putting out

[C_theSurrealist]

Wow this poem is so honest with the real situation in this world. We shouldn't waste our time, we need to spend it for our love ones and productive things. This is impressive. Keep writing!!

[Scarlett]

"So listen to an old mans wish and do as I say
Don't stay inside , don't waste this day
Go find those friends and that other you need
Never follow the path of evil and greed."

I found this inspiring. It's sad that people just take their family for granted. I know I do a lot but it's something I'm working on. Friends are one of the most valuble treasures we could have. They're worth more than gold and diamonds.

[sonnie ibadah]

"The things I do and that I've done
Will never complete me or make me one
Though I hold back the tears and the crying
I still have to tell myself I'm lying....." this is really heartfelt. the flow is amazing, it spells sincerity and the words just dig deep into your soul and challenges you to ask that stinging question, "what is the value of my life? is it my past fears or courage, tears or laughter, memories or regrets..." Amazing write!

[My-two-lives]

I really really liked this.
As you're reading the poem, you can feel emotions which are true and sincere rolling off the screen, and in my head it was really like i could see this old man and his memories. It has good imagery, the rhyming scheme is perfect, and the story it tells is inspiring.
I look forward to reading more of your work, and i really love this poem.

[Serena]

Really deep and emotional . I loved the strength of the rhyme.
My favorite is the end:
"Now as I fade I have words for you
My life is gone nothing I can do
So listen to an old mans wish and do as I say
Don't stay inside , don't waste this day
Go find those friends and that other you need
Never follow the path of evil and greed"
I love this :)

[Call_Me_Miss_Imperfect]

Oh my gosh. I really like this! It is amazing, Cody. I am not even kidding with you. I do not see why there is not more views and reviews. We all know one person that lives their life this way. Time does fly by way too fast. As time goes by, people change. We lose friends and family and sometimes gain some more within time too. Your title corresponds with the moral of this awesome poem. I can see why you were crying while writing this piece. It is deep and heart warming. If a person is not touched by this, they have themselves fooled or they truly do not have a heart. I love the beginning to the end. I love how you some dialogue in here too.
I only noticed one mistake:

Dad telling me "Son your too thin" ("your" should be "you're since it needs the word 'are'. That is the reason for that contraction.)

My favorite lines:

As I moved on I found new friends
Some left others stayed till the end

(I love these lines because it is so true. I have lost so many friends from either the changes or death.)

Once this again, this pure excellence. Keep writing. :D :D :D