Prison & Guns

A Chapter by M Garcia

A couple friends on Facebook had these jokes and/or thoughts as their status today. I thought they were funny and had to share with you all here.

~ Prison & Guns ~

Thank you to my Facebook friends Jo Fears (Redneck Home Security & Prison Pants) and Carrie Nasca (Promised Land)

REDNECK HOME SECURITY SYSTEM:
1. Buy a pair of size 14-16 work boots.
2. Put them on front porch with a copy of Guns & Ammo.
3. Put some giant dog dishes next to boots & magazines.
4. Leave note on your door: "Bubba: Me & Bertha went for more ammo & beer. Back soon. Don't mess with the pit bulls; they messed the mailman up bad this morning. I don't think Killer took part; hard to tell from all the blood. I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside. Be right back.

PRISON PANTS

To all you guys who "sag" your pants and show your butt &
underwear, did you know it originated in prison? It was a signal to
the other MEN that you are "available". So if you wanna keep going
around looking like your "available" for another dude to "tap that"
then keep thinking you're cool while I think you look like a Fool!!!

THE PROMISED LAND

‎5000 years ago, Moses said "pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land."

When welfare was introduced Roosevelt said "lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, light up a camel, this is the promised land.

Today the government has stolen your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price of camels and mortgaged the promised land to China

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