Different

Different

A Story by Manda
"

It just isnt the same anymore...

"

      You walk past me as if you don’t know me. Why? How can you act as if nothing ever happened between you and I. I know that what we had can’t be forgotten overnight.... We had been so young and in love. We would walk side by side with our fingers rapped around each other’s. Our hearts skipped a beat as we kissed in the evening breeze. I remember your beautiful light blue eyes and the smell of your cologne as it stained my skin. Those few weeks we spent together had been so amazing, but now all the memories are tearing me apart. Those pieces that had once been glued back together had been broken once again. It's so hard watching you walk by with another girl by your side. Now your hand intertwined with hers. You told me you hated her and now look... You're laughing and flirting. You lied to me. I thought you were different and someone I thought I could trust, but you turned your back to me. I am invisible to you. Don't act like it's not true. When our arms brush across each other’s in the hallway you won’t even look at me. You're different now. "It's over." The words you had once said reappeared and crushed me even more inside...

 

© 2010 Manda


Author's Note

Manda
Something else I am feeling inside....

My Review

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Reviews

How sad . . . Leave that jerk behind! (: Good luck working everything out and i really appreciate your writing.

Posted 13 Years Ago


I think it's cute, but overdone topic, you know? I can hear you saying this, it's not all that artistic, but there's room for improvement:) The details are tremendous

Posted 13 Years Ago


It happens sometimes. Putting those feeling out helps and I think you’ve done a great job putting this write together

Posted 13 Years Ago


Powerful write. Great expression of your heartbreak. Never easy to accept or explain. You paint a fabulous picture that depicts how you felt early in this write. Continued to lead the reader down your valley of sorrow. Things will get better.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Wow, it's so weird that I choose to read this just now, when things between me and a guy I was seeing have just fell apart. Well, actually he just stopped talking to me after a month.
But reading this reminded me of how my heart used to skip beats when I kissed him, and the smell of his cologne.
Nice write, I really like it.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Aww, I could really sympathise with you on this one. I think that a lot of people who read this will be able to as well, and I think that your honesty and vulnerability in this write will definitely add to that. I liked the fact that you addressed the person you were speaking to directly, as it made the piece all the more believable, and all the more real and raw. There were a few spelling mistakes, and so I would definitely encourage you to proof-read your work before publishing. Other than that though, this was great. :)
~PaperHearts

Posted 13 Years Ago


A strong piece indeed

Posted 13 Years Ago


As i always say, when you pour your emotions into a piece, it comes out quite well. A few minor spelling errors that I am sure you will catch if you decide to polish this piece up a bit, but overall a strong piece. In an unusual style for you, you kept your wording very subtle here and depended on the emotion to carry the weight of this piece - which surprisingly worked very well in this instance. I think you would do well to play around with this balance of subtle words and strong emotion a bit more - you may be surprised at what you will create.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Oh my, so much emotion, strength. The thing I find so beautiful about this is that when someone hurts us, it feels like the world crumbles and we feel so weak in comparison to our usual self, but then, when we write, our words, our passion it all comes out in every line, every syllable. I pity the man who hurts a woman, especially a woman who writes. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned", never forget that. So maybe he's a d****e I say you forget about him and have a little fun of your own. ;) Every girls got a wild side. Bust it out. ;D
-Cathrine

Posted 13 Years Ago


In the . . . . fifth to the last line? . . . you said, "Your laughing and flirting." Your is the possessive form of you, so I think it should be the contraction you're. Other than that it's hopelessly sad and I hope it doesn't happen to you again anytime soon.

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Added on September 25, 2010
Last Updated on October 31, 2010

Author

Manda
Manda

OH



About
Hello! My names Manda. I am 24 years of age and have an Associate of Arts degree. I am a former National Honors Society member and am hoping to continue my education by starting my Bachelors degree in.. more..

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