To my father. An abandond daughter

i learned that i can't move on with your life with an open past this is how closed mine

TO MY DEAR FATHER,

hello dad, do you remember me ? well I am the two years old little daughter that you gave up on many years ago.

I am the broken hearted girl who grow up wathing other kids with their fathers happily smiling at them , holding their hands on the way to school , carrying them after a long day of studies or just hugging and kissing them showing them the love they have for them and cherring them up and i dont have that.

I became a cold heart woman , I dont allow any man in to my life becouse Iam to scared that he turns out to be like you .it is my nightmare.

did you know that:

I dreamed about having a typical family like anybody else for years, there are times when I made stories about my dad the hero who has all the good qualities in world .

when I pass to the next class the teachers ask us about our families , i start praying that the bell rings before they came to me , 'cause i can talk about my mom for days but you ? what should i say ? my dad left us for no reason and continued his life without caring about anything. or that he divorsed me with my mother.

I feel ashamed for being your daughter when I see my mo struggling to provide a good life for me , she worked day and night to get me what ever i needed and wanted.

your wife and kids me the feel " I want to kill you" every time they cross my way , and there is this once when your son saw a guy bathering me in the street and he continued his way like he didn't even saw me there; i was so upset thinking how could walk away like that ? he should have help me ? defended me ? but then it hits me if my own dad lives like i don't exist why would he care?.

althought I really wanted a father , the man who loves me , protect me from every thing, spoils me ,traits me life his little princess , does anything to keep me happy and smilling but what i got was you and you left .

I hated you when i realised  what you did and its consequences on our family , I got angry ,disppointed , depressed knowing that my hero is a selfish jerk runs after his benefits and all my childhood dreams are crushed.

today , Iam done with you. I have no more force to hate you , thinking about you is a wast of time, emotions and energy and you don't deserve that . I came to this conclusion write you a letter a empty my heart from you " my life's toxic" and tell you : my mom raised me well , she made me strong, smart, indepandent and kind lady and thanks to her I am well educaded and an respected teacher , so I am fine and I know hoa to fight for what I deserve wich is happiness .

              In the end I forgive you , have a good life with your family and I promise you I will never think about you again 

                                                                                                                                 with peace 

                                                                                                                       your abondand daughter 

Reviews

[...]

I like it this end with peace your abondand daughter . Your writing is very painful and honest and also very beautiful. Even there is lot of wounds in your childhood and your life. Also that part about your cold heart and you don't allow anybody into your life is quiet painful. It's very emotional writing but also very sad. I hope your writing will help you get through your dark season. All the best and keep great writing.

[Manel]

thank you so much i appreciate it
merci

[...]

You welcome . I hope you will soon get some beautiful life experiences.

[Marium Usman]

Its heart touching and purely written from inner piece of heart ! Just one thing to guide you there is spelling mistake on which u need to work out !

[Manel]

thank you so much Iam glad you like my peaceand about your remarque i guess sometimes i mixe french and english spelling

[Marium Usman]

Yea that's must be the case. Just work on ur vocabulary

[Christina]

Manel, A 100/100 for your emotions and thoughts.

Here's some typo and little spell mistakes you should make corrections to make it more readable. ( I hope you don't get offended!)

1) hello dad, do you remember me ? well I am the two years old littel daughter that you gave up on many years ago.

Typo:

hello dad, do you remember me ? well I am the two years old little daughter that you gave up on many years ago.

2) I became a cold heart woman , I dont allow any man in to my life becouse Iam to scared that he tourns out to be like you .it is my nightmare.

Typo:

I became a cold heart woman , I don't allow any man in to my life because I am too scared that he turns out to be like you. It is my nightmare.

3) when I passe to the next class the teachers ask us about our families , i start praying that the bell rings before they came to me , 'cause i can talk about my mom for days but you ?

Typo:

When I pass to the next class the teachers ask us about our families, i start praying that the bell rings before they came to me, 'cause i can talk about my mom for days but you ?

4) my dad left us for no raison and continued his life without caring about anything. or that he divorsed me with my mother.

Typo:

My dad left us for no reason and continued his life without caring about anything. or that he divorced me with my mother.

5) I feel ashamed for being your daughter when I se my mo struggling to provide a good life for me , she worked day and night to get me what ever i needed and wanted.

Typo:

I feel ashamed for being your daughter when I see my mom struggling to provide a good life for me, she worked day and night to get me what ever i needed and wanted.

6) your wife and kids me the feeling " I want to kill you" every time they cross my way , and there is this once when your son saw a guy bathering me in the street and he continued his way like he didn't even saw me there; i was so upset thinking how could walk away like that ? he should have help me ? defended me ? but then it hits me if my own dad lives like i don't exist why would he care?.

Typo:

Your wife and kids make me feel "I want to kill you" every time they cross my way, and there is this once when your son saw a guy bothering me in the street and he continued his way like he didn't even saw me there; I was so upset thinking how could walk away like that? He should have help me, defended me! But then it hits me if my own dad lives like i don't exist why would he care?

7) althought I really wanted a father , the man who loves me , protect me from every thing, spoils me ,traits me life his littel princess , does anything to keep me happy and smilling but what i got was you and you left .

Typo:

Although I really wanted a father, the man who loves me , protect me from every thing, spoils me, traits me life his little princess , does anything to keep me happy and smiling but what i got was you and you left .

8) I hated you when i realised what you did and its consequences on our family , I got angry ,dispointed , depressed knowing that my hero is a selfish jerk runs after his benefits and all my childhood dreams are crushed.

Typo:

I hated you when i realised what you did and its consequences on our family , I got angry ,disappointed , depressed knowing that my hero is a selfish jerk runs after his benefits and all my childhood dreams are crushed.

9) today , I done with you. I have no more force to hate you , thinking about you is a wast of time, emotions and energy and you don't deserve that . I came to this conclusion write you a letter a empty my heart from you " my life's toxic" and tell you : my mom raised me well , she made me strong, smart, indepandent and kind lady and thanks to her I am well educaded and an respected teacher , so I am fine and I know hoa to fight for what I deserve wich is happiness .

Typo:

Today, I am done with you. I have no more force to hate you, thinking about you is a waste of my time, emotions and energy and you don't deserve that. I came to this conclusion, to write you a letter an empty my heart from you "my life's toxic" and tell you : my mom raised me well, she made me strong, smart, independent and kind lady and thanks to her I am well educated and a respected teacher, so I am fine and I know how to fight for what I deserve which is happiness .

10) In the end I forgive you , have a good life with your family and I promise you I will never thing about you again

Typo:

In the end I forgive you, have a good life with your family and I promise you I will never think about you again.

[Manel]

thank you so much christina you took the time to correct my mistakes
iam glad that you did and deffinitly not offended
iam here to learn from you guys and iam open for constractif critisism

[Christina]

Manel, I am glad to know you are so full of positivity and God will bless you dear :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

Love is what actually matters my dear...
I'm sad cause you had to write something like this. But I'm proud of you as you did it... The end lines, throw a big sense of relief as I reach to the end. When I begin, I just became anxious and nervous as to how it would end.. but you did it with bravery... So proud of u...
I'm sure u'll find many people who will be so kind and sincere to you... you'll just love their company. I'm proud of your mom that she raised a brave girl all alone ... You are wonderful and just let your life be the same....
you'll have so much in future that you'll then get afraid explaining about your family!!!
have a great future ahead!!!
Anindita : )

[Manel]

thank you Anindita for your sweet review and these kind words
i really gratful to all of you guys for your encouraging words
thanks

[Anindita Janhabee]

most welcome...

[Marina]

Thank you for sharing this. It's a sign of bravery; be it your father or not, I am sure you will (if not have already) find people in your life that you consider a family. From my own experience, a family member, is not always family with the truest sense of the word.
It was a good and hard read. :)

[Manel]

you are absolutly right blood is not a definition of family but love is
as long as we have people that love us we don't need a fake blood connected family
thank you for passing by i appreciate it

[wordman]

such an emotional write,how many letters like this out there. i wonder

[Manel]

thank you wordman i appreciate it ,
i don't know how many letters are out there but after this one made me feel good