Irish Green

Irish Green

A Poem by Melanie Jane Boicourt Shanks

With some Irish Spring, I lather well.

Green Apple shampoo, I love the smell.

Whistle clean now, I hang my green rag.

I wear my lime shirt and jeans with green tag.

In my hunter green truck I drive off to work.

Irish cream in my coffee, for a nice perk.

Her emerald eyes greet me at the door.

She says to me, "Why all the green for?"

I try to think of something Irish to say.

Then she says, "St. Patrick's was yesterday."

 

© 2008 Melanie Jane Boicourt Shanks


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Instead of "Why all the green for?" I'd suggest "What's all the green for?" I think it still flows with your poem - and it makes more sense. Did you mean to type "what's"?

Charming and very funny - You should try making some of these into e-cards, if you want to. I think you might even be able to sell them and promote your work. (some people are insulted when I suggest this, no idea why, but please don't be mad)

Thanks for sharing, it made me smile :D

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

omg that was sooooooo funny :D lmaooo

:D x 100000000000000000000000000000000000000 = that many good smileys for a great funny poem

-Aaron

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Haha, I love the last line where she says,""St. Patrick's was yesterday." That made me laugh. But this was a very good poem... :D

-Nicole

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

yes. casey is right about the sentence. but, it is very amusing poem

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Instead of "Why all the green for?" I'd suggest "What's all the green for?" I think it still flows with your poem - and it makes more sense. Did you mean to type "what's"?

Charming and very funny - You should try making some of these into e-cards, if you want to. I think you might even be able to sell them and promote your work. (some people are insulted when I suggest this, no idea why, but please don't be mad)

Thanks for sharing, it made me smile :D

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

I'm a bit late on this one....but
that kinda adds to the chuckle ...for me
I'd do something like that for real....lol
clever...

Blesssssssssss

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

lol, I really like this one. very light spirited and humorous. This is a great St. Patrick's poem! It would be so cute on a card!!!!!

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Cute! That is what happens when you start celebrating Saint Patricks Day in January. D****t!

Peace and luv,
Gabe


Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

^-^ lol this is great! I LOVE it!

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Irish cream in my coffee, for a nice perk.
that's the only the that throws it off "for a nice perk"
maybe if you put "a nice little perk" just to keep the flow or something..
its your poem.. its great how it is!


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This was a fun little poem... sorry my 'review' is a day late ;)
Like Dylan I had a slight stumble mid-way. I stumbled over the Irish cream line the first time I read it. Maybe one beat too many in the 'to go'. If the line was shortened by a syllable it might work better. Something like 'Irish cream in my coffee, just for a perk'. Just a suggestion. Hope you don't mind. Either way it is a good poem and was obviously written for fun above anything else.
Well done and thanks for sharing. NH

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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43 Reviews
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Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on March 16, 2008
Last Updated on March 18, 2008

Author

Melanie Jane Boicourt Shanks
Melanie Jane Boicourt Shanks

Fort Wayne, IN



About
I have been writing since I knew how. Before that I would just draw pictures to tell a story. My true passion is poetic lyrics. That is mostly what I am inspired to write. I have been dabbling in othe.. more..

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