Privy

Lyrics to a song I've written. I embedded a rough version of the song into the text area. It's in its primordial stage of development. I ought to expand on the piece and give it some substance.

I can't discern fear from foresight. 
I apperceive and do believe 
My fears to be recondite, 
But you know. 

You know. 

Reviews

[KAOlmsted]

Is this the cathartic write? It is customary, when one sends a PM shamelessly plugging their writing, to actually include the title of the piece being shamelessly plugged ;-)

As a song? Meh...who's your audience? I can count on one hand the number of people who know what recondite means without Googling it (raises hand...but I'm not a huge fan of this type of music) *laugh*

If you do expand on this, and, believe me, you should, because this is in no way, shape, or form finished, may I suggest you consider the sage words of one Mister Dick Clark: "It's got a good beat and you can dance to it..." That's all you need, baby...

Thanks for sharing this with us...always a pleasure to read you.

[Trevor Bushey]

Thanks for obliging me. And I'll forever remember, after being so caustically advised, to include the title of the piece being shamelessly plugged in a PM.

Yes, a song. I might post a rough version along with the lyrics above to better illustrate the mood of the poem, for those whose understanding falters at the sight of a word. ;) I don't know that I have an audience, hence why I had to appeal to you in a PM. In all seriousness, I can't say I had written this piece for any particular audience. It might appeal to anybody who relates to having feelings of oppressive guilt. And how did you intuit the type of music that these lyrics were written for? Or are there distinctions to be made between types of music and genres of music?

I'll attempt to develop the piece in both its lyrical and musical forms, but I'm not sure it'll qualify as something you can dance to.

Trevor

[KAOlmsted]

Caustic?? kimmer?? Never ;-)

Oppressive guilt, I actually get that from the few lines you have written here, so well done getting your point across to a woman with an above average IQ *laugh* My point, of course, is when writing lyrics, it is best to kiss...keep it simple, stupid ;-) If you want to impress with your ability to pull big fat words out of your a*s, perhaps you should stick to poetry, a medium in which you dominate, where big fat words are concerned.

I think my facetiousness was lost on you when I said I wasn't a huge fan of this type of music...no worries, it's hard to see my eyes roll when you're not in the room with me ;-) What I meant was, clearly, I have no idea what type of music you are going for, as you have given us exactly five lines with which to decipher, and I saw absolutely no potential for Swedish heavy metal in them whatsoever, so...meh...

I almost think you're beginning to get me...I'll recruit someone who actually does that sort of thing and have them pray for your poor lost soul ;-)

[Trevor Bushey]

Must you be so condescending, stupid? I won't tolerate it. ;) As for what kind of music I am going for, I've embedded a definitive answer into the text region. Formulate another caustic remark through the medium of another sense organ, will you?

And I might only pray for my own poor lost soul, if I can admit to it being lost.

[KAOlmsted]

Ha! As a matter of fact, yes...I must be ;-)

God you have no idea how much I wanted that song to suck *laugh* but I really like it. God damn it.

In all seriousness, Trevor, really well done. You have this sort of haunting, ethereal voice, don't you? And the guitar work added to that quality...I would absolutely listen to more of this. Nice job.

I know...it's a rather disturbing side of me, isn't it ;-)