Tortured Heart

I'm sorry I'm not stronger for you...

After all they put me through

 After all the years of being 2nd best 

And only being played with

 I think to myself "Why the hell should I believe you?" 

How do I know your "I love yous" aren't a lie 

A trick for a cheap laugh or a cynical smile 

What makes you so different from those other guys 

How do I know you won't make me cry 

Alone in my room where no one can here me 

 ...And then I remember

 It's the way you called me baby 

On that sick and tiresome day 

When my fragile walls are crumbling 

You have a hundred sweet words to say 

Calling me angel, worthy, divine 

It pulls an extinct smile out of the darkness 

How I wish to believe your truly mine 

As I wish to be yours, held in a warm caress 

To give into this giddiness...and yet 

I still feel as but a toy 

Broken, beaten and chipped 

Because of all those other insincere boys 

Who played with me then kicked me out the door 

Leaving me alone to crumble with an internal war 

So how can I be sure, after all that hurt 

You'll be the one to heal my tortured heart

Author's Note

I hate that I'm damaged:/ I'm so sorry

Reviews

[Pax]

don't hate yourself too much my friend, broken hearts and lies are always like that, after we've gone through that, we become strong, and prepared for the next chapters of our lives because we learned to put things in the past, if the past ever came back, if the feelings is not the same then we know, its not really meant to be...

Well expressed thoughts.
great work my friend.

[Lost in Wonderland]

thank you friend:)

[Pax]

as always your welcome... hugs, hope your doing fine after you've expressed your feelings... its reliefs us when we write our distress...

[Lost in Wonderland]

I'm actually a lot better:))) thank you for checking! *hugs*

[Salar Majak]

hey, that was deep and made my eyes water, i feel what you mean, and by the way the expressions were amazingly used, the poem flowed nicely, i'm sorry for what you feel but evryonce in while we all feel alittle broken :) you'll rise again, well done.

[Ahmad Cox]

Hug. Don't feel sorry. We are all traveling along our own journeys. You don't have to ever feel like you have to apologize for who you or the emotions you are feeling. Thank you for pouring yourself into this poem and sharing such an honest piece.

[Kyle Sky]

Love is pain when with the wrong person. I cant sympathize with you but i can tell you that you showed strength in this piece and you deserve something to feel good about.
On the poem itself,The theme and the athmoshere was good. I just found the structure of the poem a little unorganized. But the true attractiveness lies in the words and the maning it gives off. Great piece.

[zainul]

Awesome and wonderful!
Enjoyed reading.
100/100

[Invisible]

love is a cruel mistress, or in this case a hot-headed jerk, i suppose it's just people, hard to say. good poem anyways, sad as it may be.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

On that sick and tiresome day/when my walls are crumbling. What fantastic use of expression and metaphor. This is a really good poem. Sad and heart felt and full of doubt but so well written. It flows well and just grips the reader in the white water rapids of its passage.

[Rika]

that was realy good, im sorry that your feeling that way, i feel the same sometimes, just stay strong! and dont listen to him, just forget about him.