Let's Have a Chat

Let's Have a Chat

A Story by Lost in Wonderland

Time to talk about everyone's favorite taboo topic: rape culture.


    So, let's have a quick chat about everyone's favorite taboo topic: rape culture! Now, I know this subject makes people squirm and no one wants to talk about it- but that isn't solving anything. And I can prove it.
In 2011 the FBI crime clock found that every 6.3 minutes, someone was raped. In 2014, that turned to a rape every 4.5 minutes. This doesn't specify gender, this violent, dehumanizing crime can effect anyone.
This issue is clearly not going away. Rape culture is alive and arguably thriving in this country. So how do we combat this and keep our friends, our family, and ourselves safe?

    1. We need to teach from an early age that no 100% means no. I remember watching the fairly odd parents at an early age claiming that when a girl says no, she really means yes. Initially, that may seem harmless but that teaches children at a very young age that no doesn't hold weight for a woman, and can be ignored or argues against. Let's get one thing straight, if someone tells you they don't want to kiss/date/sleep with you, that is not an invitation to "win them back" or whatever. That is the time for you to politely accept their right as a human being and move on.

    2. We need to stop accepting toxic masculinity as fact. "Boys will be boys" allows kids to think that they can get away with violence against others on the grounds that men are naturally aggressive. That isn't fair to men or women. This sets up a norm for men that they have to be macho and can only feel angry. In our culture, men aren't allowed to cry or feel pain or be vulnerable and since they aren't allowed to process that, it can build up to negative outburst or implosions. Women on the other hand are blamed for men's violence against them because "they can't control their urges." This depicts men as deviant beasts that only think about having sex. It becomes our fault because we wore a crop top in 100 degree weather, or because we had a drink. Also, this is harmful for men because if society thinks men are all sex crazed maniacs, then men aren't taken seriously if they are sexually assaulted/raped. They may be shamed into silence because they should be the powerful one, right? Wrong. Toxic masculinity hurts everyone. Every rape victim is valid, no matter what gender or lack thereof.

    3. We need to prosecute rapist! And I don't mean going to simply trial, I don't mean giving them a measly six month, I don't mean giving them a stern talking to and allowing them to stay at a university. I mean you took away someone's sense of security and ownership of their body. You not only damaged them physically but psychologically. Rapists are the absolute scum of the earth to think they have a right to anyone else's mind and body aside from their own and they need to be jailed for a long time, and given some serious therapy to figure out what made them think it was okay to abuse someone like that.

    4. We need to talk about it. I guarantee you, whether you realize it or not, you know a survivor of sexual assault or rape. If someone chooses to confide in you about their experience, don't brush it off or tell them what they should have done to prevent it. Listen. LISTEN. Comfort the, ask them what they need from you and don't give them any more or less. Do NOT blame them. If we stop stigmatizing rape victims, hopefully it will encourage more women and men to report these crimes.

    5.We need to call rape what it is. Rape is not sex. Rape is a violet assault. You cannot have nonconsensual sex, it doesn't exist. And once realize this, maybe we'll start to treat it like every other violent crime: murder, assault, battery, etc...

    If you took the time to read all of this, thank you. I encourage everyone to do research and inform themselves on the topic of rape culture, and gender/racial equality. We are all human and deserve to be treated as such. If you are a survivor, know that I am an ally. I believe you and I respect your truth. 
Much love friends.

© 2016 Lost in Wonderland

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Well said. A conversation that needed to be had.

Posted 1 Year Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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Added on October 19, 2016
Last Updated on October 19, 2016
Tags: Feminism, Rape Culture, Essay, Social Justice


Lost in Wonderland
Lost in Wonderland

Wherever my books take me

Hi I'm mickey:) Welcome to my page I've been on this sight for a couple of years now and enjoy getting my writing out there for the world to read:) I appreciate comments and will read anything you .. more..