My Past

My Past

A Poem by Speak in Silence

Water fills blackened lungs
Constrained by my past demons
Scars fill my arms
Slight sounds of whispers in the wind
From past loves and broken hearts

My heart's trying to tell me something
Or is it just the past
Which lurks in the black

The vague sense of nothing
The faint smell of pills
The obscure sight of blood
Makes me want to fall
Fall back into my past

I can't
Not this time
I am with you
You won't let me go down
Not again at least
You couldn't catch me last time
Fore you never knew
Fore I never wanted you too

I never wanted you to be disappointed
I never wanted you to see me cry
I always wanted you to hold my hand
And keep my head held high

I told myself I didn't need you
I told myself I could make it
I was lying to myself all along

I'm sorry if I hurt you
You know that's what I do
I appear
I fall
You catch me
I leave
Then
I destroy

Everyone in my past
Most in my future
Even you, my love
But I promised not to hurt you anymore
This is a promise I vow to keep

You name used to haunt me
But now it makes me smile
Even though my past
Threatens to pull me back
I know this time
Someone will catch me
This time, we will last

In the four months we were apart
I learned life's' lessons
Hate drives me
Lies haunt me
Secrets kill me
Death lurks within me
Fate doesn't exist
And

Love destroys me

© 2012 Speak in Silence


Author's Note

Speak in Silence
This is about me, my love, my past, and my future

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Reviews

Love destroys me

that says it all...great write!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thank you (:
Sirius King

7 Years Ago

ur welcome :-)
You wrote this so vividly and in such great detial. It's intense, I couldn't stop reading it! It's so deep and dark it is just so beautifully written! Wow.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thank you
Wow, this is amazing! amazing work! I loved the format and the way you write! it's Great, just an Excellent job!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thank you (:
 Soul Fire

7 Years Ago

welcome
Too much pride is a sure way to end up lonely... we can never do everything on our own and when we truly love someone there is no shame in leaning on them and letting them lean on us. A very honest and open poem.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Yes, very true
Pleasant read. I like it!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thanks (: Also thanks for reading my work (: I will read some of yours soon (:
Very sincere and deep... I loved the imagery of it all... :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thank you (:
I will have to re-read this later, as I just got out of the ER, to get the full value of this, but what I think of it right now is very relatable. I like how you put it all into one poem and didn't make it sound forced. Well done.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thank you (: Read it whenever you get a chance, I know you're busy (:
Flower Meadow

7 Years Ago

Mhm, I will probably read it later in the week. Im not allowed to go anywhere until the pain I've be.. read more
Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Oh okay, thanks for reading though (:
Wow. This is deep. While I was reading this I could really feel the emotion coming from it. You really do have an extraordinary talent. Keep it up! :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Speak in Silence

7 Years Ago

Thank you (:

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478 Views
9 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on September 22, 2012
Last Updated on September 22, 2012
Tags: thoughts, suicide, death, love, saviour, wind, past, me, pills, blood, nothing, fate, secrets, whispers, lies, hate

Author

Speak in Silence
Speak in Silence

NC



About
Hi! My name's Victoria and I'm a Tumblr addict. I love bands and my doggie Scoutypoo. I like going in vintage and antique markets and I like the smell of old books. I like how the sun shines through.. more..

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