Sister (Settling Into Something That Effects Reality)

Sister (Settling Into Something That Effects Reality)

A Poem by PoeticFury

The mind is a terrible thing to waste, but also a terrible place to wait.

What makes a criminal? 
No seriously what makes a criminal?
Don't say that its the music or its the life of the streets or the path that you've decided to go down and then go to jail getting out explaining to me that its something you just have to live through and see, but then tell your parents that you lost your temper for a second they chose to lose it, and then your farther just tells you to cool it, and I look back asking you who do you think you fooling while all along I haven't been able to come across anyone who can give me a direct answer to what creates this so while you are in these streets physically making an a*s out of you and me mentally I'm assuming.... making an a*s out of you and me.

Still waiting on an answer. 
Although here I am full of questions.
Does it happen when you see that newborn come out of the womb of its mother and you start to wonder how you are going to provide when one of you has a part time job while the second one is still in school, but all you hear is the suggestions of doing the right thing, yet that seems to work for everybody else except for each other. 
Is it when you finally graduate then get a full time job and walk across that stage fulfilling what everyone thought you would be good at the time when it was just an idea in your head?

While the adulation comes in with the congratulations based off a four plus year journey coming from words that you said. Asking yourself on me did they place a bet? 
Obtaining that piece of paper that has your name with a title, but fails to mention if you didn't have a full ride on a scholarship the little invisible contract at the bottom still reminds you that you're in debt. 
The other end of that walkway thinking that story is over is the real stage being set. 

Its hard to find a job in your career field. They still say its going to get better, but sometimes it too will be worse
You  go to move out of your parents place donate to those who seem like they are really in need.
Even gave to a guy on the corner who looked as if he couldn't breathe with nothing on his feet because they were full of dirt.
Get denied for every apartment application that you put in then you miss out because a guy who looks like someone you helped happen to have better credit than you, but it looks like the same guy you helped out on the corner he just has a decent car, clean haircut all of a sudden, and a fresh new pair of shoes. 
However you don't curse

You ask the owners of the building what happen?
They just say his score is a bit better and besides he was here yesterday. Therefore he was actually in line metaphorically speaking first.
In this time I ask is this what creates a criminal?
Can one really say this is why I do what I do?
Maybe the advancement of this one situation was not credit, but something that was called life I didn't give enough credit to.

Is a criminal created when you can't pay bills?
Have so much to say yet not a soul to talk to so nobody will ever know how you truly feel.
Maybe taking out a loan will help since there is no help and we are alone having no way to communicate beside the free Wi-Fi and a app on a broken down phone. 
Trying to keep God and gospel in heart, but it has become a house inside and there is a difference between a house and a home. 
Unable to afford insurance or professional help so all you have is a song.

Hearing the words echoing in your head from your parents saying you can always come back here when things get hard.
Although they have passed on and you have a hard time reminding yourself that they are gone.
Is being a criminal over drafting your own bank account till its in the negative balance?
Where you have to select rather its gonna be lights or water one of them you are going to have to let be.
No positive numbers in the account and like the pictures you look at that are suppose to remind you of positive times you rack your brain trying to figure out is it what you are fighting for now or is it just a distance memory?

Are these ways born just from realization setting in that there is really nowhere to go? 
Nothing but a few dollars in your pocket, so you buy a few hot pockets.
Trying to keep food inside your body.
Somehow you can't help but answer truthfully when they ask are you okay?
Immediately you rebuttal fine. Inside you know there is more.

You go back to your parents home nobody is there.
You cleared out everything from a few months ago.
They never had it all, but they made sure you had enough.
They protected so much never had the guts to say we were poor.

Your body frozen in time, your mind wants to run.
Your few real friends and family offer help such as a place to rest and lay your head in that extra room if you need to use one.
You go to walk out the door to find the note that has the combination to the permit and safe that holds his gun.
That your dad once own.. He wants you to keep it in the family, so now its yours except it can only reside on your waste side because again you have no home.

You walk out the door and hear the words freeze with your hands up. You hit the ground because you hear bullets flying up the street as these officers jam your face into a puddle of water cuffing you laying there truly feeling like a duck. They mirandize you and you are just trying to figure out the crime.
Is it because of the color of my skin?
Is it because of the person or people that I call friend.
What is it that I have done? Just give me some kind of hint or sign.

Is a criminal created when you are placed in the back of that car?
Is it created when they tell you that we just need to look into somethings its all going to be fine?
When you have been beaten within an inch of your life trying to process this with your mind and its hard to tell.
Does the manifestation start when you are forced inside of that cell.
When beliefs are thrown out the window because at first I didn't believe in hell.

Do you point the blame on someone else or yourself.
Is it the fault of the rich not helping those less wealthy.
Is a criminal born because he wants to do the right thing for his community like a modern day Peter Pan to make sure that the sick and starve get a meal of any kind and have some kind of chance at being healthy.
The messages are subliminal, but behind everything is motive. 
A reason why...

Is a criminal really a criminal if they just decide to do wrong.
Is a criminal really a criminal if at first they did they best and gave it a try.
I don't condone doing wrong.. 
I just know that there are things that can drive a person over the ledge.

My sisters 
My brothers
Like cancer cells we all are born with them inside of us...
Although I ask if we care about something we will do whatever it takes right. 
As long as its proper in our eyes
Then while other people have opinions its freedom of speech the system mixes facts with lies.

We are all giving a life and what we do is based on what we choose, but its more apparent to me that the ones that are hardest to stop I don't classify as "criminal" I just classify them as the ones who don't have a damn thing left to lose.

In conclusion I ask you 
What makes a criminal? 

© 2020 PoeticFury

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Added on February 3, 2020
Last Updated on February 3, 2020
Tags: criminal, psychology, mental, thinking



New Orleans, LA

Heaven has no fury like a writer with emotion. I love writing more than I love life. Why? Cause writing is my life, and without it I have no life. I enjoy music, and meeting new people. Also like most.. more..

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