A Sense of Change

I wonder what it would be like...

I awoke. My small aptartment was swimming... everything usually most ordinary to me was bathed in monochromatic blue. Even my glowing red digital clock glowed in a marvelous shade of aqua... I thought it strange, but not at all frightening... just the contrary... it was beautiful. Underneath the awe of color was the dull thud of another late night headache. These annoyances were seeming to become more and more commonplace. I lifted the covers and swung my feet over the side of the bed. Childhood fears of the thing under the bed were pushed away as I placed my feet on the cold hardwood floor. I sat there momentarily before shuffling sleepily the short distance to my bathroom. Even here, the cold, harsh light of the simple lightbulb and pull chain was not its usual yellow glare, but a dreamy blue. This was all so pleasing to my sleepy senses and with the dull thud of the pain in my temples demanding attention, I never even stopped to think that there might be something wrong. I opened the medicine cabinet without even glancing into the mirrored door. I fumbled angrily with the child-proof cap of the asprin, and all at once noticed my right hand... it looked old... or like it was perhaps covered in elephant skin... this occurance startled me so badly that I threw the asprin container and the brittle plastic shattered against the hard tiled wall showering me in tiny pills. I quickly looked to my other hand and found it normal... completely normal except for the strange cerlulian discoloration the whole world seemed to share. Yes... my hands were normal. I moved quickly to close the mirrored door of the medicine cabinet, but hesitated sharply... I was afraid of what my reflection would show. I was sure my visage would be not myself, but something horrid... I swung the mirror shut painfully slow, it's hinges complaining noisily... At the sight of my reflection the world ceased to make any sense. The cause of my headache was painfully and visibly obvious... the muscles in my face and forehead were contorted into such a hideous grimace that I was unrecognizeable to myself... It seemed as if my face was being pulled into the center of my skull. I screamed... involentary and primal, but the sound that escaped from my throat was as foreign as my visage in the mirror. It was not the yelp of a middle aged man, but the terrible roar of a tormented beast, loud enough to crack the mirror down the center. The strange sound of my own gutteral howl scared me so badly that I scrambled backward, my calves connected with the edge of the shower/bathtub and tumbled inside, clawing at the colorful plastic curtain, tearing it down on top of me... At that moment, I once again noticed my hand. I held them both up in front of my throbbing face. The same kind of muscular spasm was affecting them as well...the skin was rising and falling in horrible waves... it also seemed to be thickening. I recoiled and threw my arms behind me, flailing, trying to rise from my awkward position. Much to my surprise, the force of my sudden forward lunge was enough to send me flying into the opposite wall and in doing so, I also completly destroyed the wall I had pushed off of. Through a haze of pain and confusion I slowly got up and opened my eyes. The blue color of the world around me had somehow darkened into a menacing violet. I bounded from my bathroom, stumbling over the shredded plastic shower curtain and fell into my bed. I rolled over onto my back and touched my face... to my horror I felt the muscles still in a hardened knot that spasmed and undulated. I tried to think thru the pain... what could this be? A heart attack? Not likely... there was simply no malady that would come to mind that would cause these symptoms... I knew I needed to call an ambulance, but what would I tell them? Help me... only help. I picked up the cell phone on the night table next to the bed and flipped open the cover. My hands shaking I began pushing the glowing buttons...9...1... but suddenly upon pressing the second button my finger simply went through the phone... and utterly destroyed it. I cursed loudly, my voice still unnaturally gutteral and lionlike. I withdrew my finger and took a close look at my fingernail... Blood trickled down onto my linens. The nail itself seemed to be moving... thickening and growing into a jagged black talon. I quickly splayed out both my hands before me, dropping the shattered phone... All of my fingers were bleeding and pushing out almost eagle like black claws. This did not effect me in the slightest... though at first I could not know why... I should have been screaming like a lunatic, but something had calmed me. The color of the world was now a bright pulsating red. "Thru rose colored glasses..." I thought, and even chuckled at this ridiculousness, my slight laugh sounding like a cartoon demon. What was keeping me so calm..? I realized quickly that it was not the strange red glow of everything... not my own mind, but a smell. Yes... a smell. I breathed in deeply thru my nostrils... I had a sensation that my nose was actually widening and spreading to let more of this delicious aroma in and the relization that this was indeed happening did not frightened me in the slightest. The air I was breathing in was wonderful... completely captivating. This fragrance drove out all else... fear, pain and even panic at the bizarre situation I had found myself in were swept away from my mindscape, further and further with each inhale of heavenly scent. I dreamily thought "follow my nose... it always knows..." I chuckled again as I thought of large cartoon bird with a rainbow colored nose... I was also aware that this was not the creature that I was changing into, and I would not be after cereal when the tranformation was complete. What was the source of this aroma? How can I describe it? It was like cooking meat... yet not. Somehow cold, but still as enticing... a huge cut of sirloin full of fat and slathered in butter, sweet and salty and coppery with blood... yes blood... I grasped the sheet in my pulsating clawed hands and lifted it to my deformed stretching nostrils... It was indeed the blood. The urge to devour the sheet overtook me, but I did not. I steadied myself, climbed carefully out of my bed and walked to my window. This window was the most redeeming feature of my small apartment... It was a huge. Though my quarters were only on the third floor it gave a beautiful panorama of the city outside... the full moon shone down and seemed to be the source of the reddish light that permeated everything. I opened the window, crouched before there on the carpeted floor and stilled myself. A cool breath of winter air chilled my skin and turned my breath to smoke... The late night snow was ubroken and crisp... "The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow..." I thought to myself. I suddenly wanted to be outside. I wanted to be free of the confinements of this small room. I wanted to run as fast as I could through the darkness just to feel the strength of my own limbs. With this realization I gave into whatever it was happening to me. I surrendered to the change. The skin on my back, both arms and legs split open simultaneously with a sickening tearing sound. There was course fur beneath... it had a newness and shimmered with slime. The muscles in my face ceased to pull in and began to push outward... I watched with eyes crossed and smiled at the thought of how ridiculous I must look. The reflection in the window before me revealed that my gums were sprouting long angular teeth... formidable and white. My muscles all over my form shook and stretched... It was painful, but the power and strength that seeped into my nerves was severly satisfying... I pulled off what was left of my curling skin in long strips and dropped them... They flopped to the floor spattering blood still sweet in my nostrils. My forhead sloped and my visage became vulpine. My ears stretched and became pointed and as they did so my sense of hearing became more and more acute... I could hear a train whistle in the distance and I knew that the closest tracks were miles away. My sight, tho still filtered with a pulsating red was more accurate than it has ever been... I could see every star in the sky. The world outside my window had become new and miraculous. But most of all, my sense of smell was astounding... it seemed it had been awakend by the scent of my own blood, but now everything seemed labled by its own smell... I captured leaves and trees and car exhaust and birds and animals of every kind and my mind now had the ability to distinguish each one from every other... In the wooded area to the north of town there was a deer... a large buck. He had been somehow wounded... perhaps hit by a car... his blood smelled even sweeter than my own. I must have it. Almost involentarily my new muscles reacted to this thought and I pounced. I tore thru the screen easily and sailed out into the open air. The part of my mind, though minute realized that I was falling and tried to panic, but instinct took over and I twisted in mid-air like an olympic diver and landed on top of a car more like a jungle cat than the wolfen creature I had become... The blood would soon be mine...

Author's Note

Don't worry... he gets the deer.

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

So the werewolf path is well traveled - but you're cartwheeling down it in a refreshing celebration of the senses. Normally we "See" the change from man to beast - hear the yelps and sometimes get feel for the feral chase - but this piece - from a cognizant creature in the process of morphing is fascinating. The little rambling bits "rose colored glasses" "the new fallen snow" - there is still a personality here - fascinating write.