OWN MAN

Different, but alluring.

He liked his eggs poached,

Cooked for exactly two minutes.

His coffee was always dark,

Steaming and sugarless.

He combed his hair forwards,

Tucked his shirt off reflex.

The hem of his trousers,

Just brushed his shoes.

Large circular rimmed spectacles,

Obsessively white teeth.

Shaved moustache,

Millimeter long nails.

Plain black socks,

Leather shoes to match.

Twenty minutes early,

Always staring at his watch.

English as impeccable

As his style.

Hearty laughter

Unlike his eyes.

Perfection a line he trudged,

Respect a moral he bestowed.

Lonely, he was always described.

But it didn’t seem to matter.

~M.Babu~

Author's Note

Tuxedo Mask by Lauren Montgomery

Reviews

[Bear]

What a fantastic exercise in detailed description, not only can I envision him but I can imagine the sound of his voice and mannerism's all from the power of your words alone. High kicks not outside his character, tuxedo mask style :~) Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

[M.Babu]

I am deeply honored by your very kind review Bear. Above all I thank that you took the time to leave your review!
~M.Babu~

[Bear]

I think many times people are intimidated by what they read and feel at a loss to what to write, I hope to inspire people with my clap's that it might catch on. Better a string of clap's than the nothing that is the response of so many. Most young and novice writers take's this silence as a disapproval of their work while I prefer the think that my work has left them speechless :~)

[M.Babu]

An innate need for validation is a writer's vice, I presume! I prefer the speechless alternative though!

[light and ashes]

I like the way you describe the man, nice write.

[Daisy Moon]

I definitely agree with a review below; from your description of this man I can see him standing before me and I can see him through the blur of the crowd. I can imagine his voice, his laughter and his body language as he speaks or as he stands still, waiting.

He does seem lonely but maybe that is because he's living a lie and his true colors are hidden underneath all of the perfectionism that is radiating from his appearance...

[M.Babu]

Thanks a bunch for the review Daisy!
I'm so happy that something of that magnitude could echo through the words.
I'm pleased if you read through my work - I'm overjoyed when you read into it!
Thanks again!
'M. Babu~

[Daisy Moon]

I love you.

[Rachael Lea]

I really like this. I hope this man cal let got of his ocd and enjoy life just a little maybe then he wouldn't be so lonely.

[M.Babu]

I hope someone will eventually love him for all his quirks!
I'm glad you gave it a read! Many 'thank yous'!
~M.Babu~

[Rachael Lea]

Hope is something nobody must loose ever! I hope that is possible, the only reason I mentioned it the way that I did was because though he has a hearty laugh his eyes do not smile.

[M.Babu]

You've actually delved into the heart of this piece, Rachel. I think I wanted him to be immovable, strong and seemingly predestined to loneliness. His only savior, his affinity to rules...
It's a sad piece - I'm glad you read into what it was.
Again, thanks for the time and insight, milady!
*tips imaginary hat*
~M.Babu~

[andrew mitchell]

This reeked of English class snobbery on a first glance, everything so particular in place! A clever amusing piece! have you been stalking me!! lol

[Solar]

'Perfection a line he trudged'

Perfectly versed - the fault lines in the impeccable personality cracked open!

[Tariq Muhammad]

love the message! Very thought provoking!

[M.Babu]

Thank you for reading sir!
~M.Babu~

[Tariq Muhammad]

My pleasure!

[John Butler]

A very intriguing write and wonderful descriptions. Striking imagery and detail add to the atmosphere and as the character is developed the reader is drawn into his world.A great write

[M.Babu]

Glad you took the time to read it John. Thanks!
~M.Babu~

[Abeer Tarek]

Absolutely amazing description! you could totally write fiction novels and I believe they would be amazing! a very different poem and a very clever one! keep writing!

[M.Babu]

You're very kind Abeer! Thanks for your extremely humbling review!
~M.Babu~

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked this poem. Great description create interesting character and life. I did like the ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[M.Babu]

Coyote, many thanks!
~M.Babu~

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.